What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0124

6151.  Generosity makes us happy.  Giving our time and money to others gives us an emotional boost.  According to researcher Christian Smith, it’s because feeling good is a product of doing good.  It’s built into our neurochemistry.  Giving triggers feel-good chemicals like endorphins, dopamine and oxytocin.  And, according to a Harvard Business School study, it’s true across cultural and economic lines;

6152.  Generosity lowers our stress.  It turns out being stingy can actually raise our stress levels.  After hooking people up to heart monitors, researchers found that when people felt they were giving too little in a transaction it actually drove up their stress.  Being generous, on the other hand, kept stress down;

6153.  Generosity improves our relationships.  In a study of generosity and its effect in marriage, researchers found that the recipient of generosity expressed high levels of marital satisfaction, but so did the giver;

6154.  It’s impossible to play in a bad mood and it turns out researchers find people are better at solving problems when they’re upbeat and positive.  The basic idea is that a positive mood loosens the grip of attention so that stimuli and ideas that used to get filtered out can now have a greater impact on mental processing.  And it’s self-perpetuating because research shows that creativity makes us happy;

6155.  A scientific study of brain circuits confirmed that creative activity is highest during and immediately after sleep, while the analytical parts of the brain (i.e., the editing and proofreading parts) become more active as the day goes on;

6156.  According to Northwestern University researchers, Brian Lucas and Loran Nordgren, people consistently underestimate the value of persisting on creative tasks.  Basically, we do our best work later in the creative process after many people have already dropped out;

6157.  Identifying with a stereotype can have a direct effect on your creativity.  When students saw themselves as uncreative, they actually were uncreative.  But students were measurably more creative when they imagined they were eccentric poets;

6158.  The mere presence of other people engaged in the same task as us can boost our motivation.  In 1920, social psychologist Floyd Allport showed that a group of people working individually at the same table performed better on a whole range of tasks even though they weren’t cooperating or competing.  Allport’s research illustrates how the energy of other people can act as a substitute team even if we’re working solo;

6159.  Team members with a big picture thinking style are great for brainstorming and creative problem solving, but when it comes to idea execution a study suggests it’s a good idea to have at least one focused, analytic thinker on your team, who can focus on the details of your project;

6160.  One key to leadership is being willing to take responsibility for your mistakes.  Good leaders do this even when they’re guilty of only 10 percent of the problem or accusation;

6161.  It takes an act of courage to own a bad situation.  It can be terribly frightening to admit a wrong, to be vulnerable and expose yourself to anger and even punishment;

6162.  If we want to turn things around, we have to add remorse to responsibility.  Our failings cause difficulty to others.  Our mistakes cost time, money and sometimes heartache.  We should express sorrow and regret for the hurt our behavior caused;

6163.  Once a major mistake comes to light, it can be easy to slink off and leave the problem in other’s hands, but you always have something you can do.  If you can’t fix the actual problem, you can still address your part in it, your failings, misjudgments, destructive habits, whatever contributed to the crisis;

6164.  Without the vital ingredient of subconscious belief alignment, where you have a core belief in your ability to attain the goal, no amount of desire or knowledge (or even effort) is going to get you there.  It’s one thing to want a goal, it’s often another thing entirely to believe you can have it.  If your subconscious mind doesn’t believe you can have it then you won’t get it.  You’ll fall prey to “subconscious sabotage” and you’ll find that you either spin your wheels, things fall apart at the last minute or you encounter so many obstacles that you just can’t seem to make any progress on your goal;

6165.  Frustration is a key indicator that shows you that you have a belief that is out of alignment with your goal.  If you do some digging, find the belief blockage and then do some reprogramming, you’ll pave the way to your success.  It usually happens very quickly once you remove the block;

6166.  The best goals are: 1.  Specific enough to focus and direct your energies; 2.  Measurable so you can keep track of your progress; 3.  Actionable with clear initiating verbs that prompt specific activity; 4.  Risky enough to leverage our natural tendency to rise to challenges; 5.  Time-keyed so you’re prompted exactly when to act; 6.  Exciting enough to inspire and harness the power of your intrinsic motivation; and 7.  Relevant within the overall context of your life;

6167.  When you hit a wall, it’s time to pivot.  Your goal might be sacred, but your strategy isn’t.  Don’t give up on your goal, just change your approach;

6168.  If you’re on a plane and your ears won’t pop, try pinching and (then) blowing your nose;

6169.  Some high schoolers are very mature (specifically female debate club members from Florida);

6170.  There are castles for sale . . . and there are people looking to buy them;

6171.  I can say I’ve met “Mr. M” and that I almost had dinner with him;

6172.  Uber’s first engineer is a pretty normal guy . . . and a ski bum;

6173.  I can say I’ve had dinner with Uber’s first engineer;

6174.  I can also say I’ve shared an Airbnb with Uber’s first engineer;

6175.  Tony Robbins’s 80^th “Date With Destiny” was (at the Palm Beach County Convention Center) in West Palm Beach, Florida from December 5^th-10^th, 2017;

6176.  I can say I was at “Date With Destiny” with Derek Hough, Julianne Hough and Brooks Laich;

6177.  I can also say I was at “Date With Destiny” with Tim Ferriss(, the author and host of the “Tim Ferriss Show”) and Marc Benioff( , the CEO of Salesforce.com);

6178.  Usher can’t resist dancing to his (own) songs at “Date With Destiny;”

6179.  Elizabeth likes to be spanked;

6180.  Shower . . . check . . . sink . . . (double) check;

6181.  Apparently, Dave Matthews was quite the ladies’ man (back in the day) in Charlottesville;

6182.  You can lose a condom in a vagina.  Who knew?

6183.  In order to change the nature of family relationships, you’ll have to change your mind about them and consider that you are the source of the anguish in your relationships rather than the individual whom you’ve pegged as the most outrageous, the most despicable or the most infuriating.  Over the years, all of these individuals have been treating you exactly as you’ve allowed them to with your reactions and behaviors.  This can miraculously change when you choose to be at peace with your relatives;

6184.  If the focus of your inner dialogue about your family members is on what they’re doing that’s wrong then that’s precisely how your relationship with them will be experienced.  If your inner speech centers on what’s annoying about them then that’s what you’ll notice.  But if you’re thinking, I am authentic and peaceful with this relative then that’s what you’ll experience even if that relative continues to be exactly the way s/he has always been;

6185.  Seth Hurwitz (the co-owner of the 9:30 Club) plays the drums;

6186.  I can say I’ve been back stage at “The Anthem;”

6187.  Stephen Kellogg is really tall;

6188.  Apparently, Richard On (the lead guitarist of “O.A.R.”) hates being called “Dick;”

6189.  Mikel Paris (the keyboardist for “O.A.R.”) seems like a nice guy;

6190.  Marc Roberge (the lead singer of “O.A.R.”) is about my height;

6191.  Apparently, there’s a $3.50 service charge added to all drinks at Saint Yves (SaintYvesDC.com) in D.C.;

6192.  I can say I’ve been to a (rock) band’s after party;

6193.  Apparently, Bradley Beal (of the Washington Wizards) likes to hang out at Saint Yves;

6194.  It doesn’t have to be perfect, just do it;

6195.  The moment you accept total responsibility for everything in your life is the day you claim the power to change anything in your life;

6196.  If you’re not willing to fail, you guarantee you’ll stay average-at-best;

6197.  If you want to grow into an extraordinary version of yourself, you must be willing to fail  . . .  a lot;

6198.  Failure brings humility.  It develops your character.  It helps you laugh at your mistakes and not take things so seriously.  Like a plant placed from the shade into sunlight, your growth rate will accelerate 10 times;

6199.  Don’t seek praise, seek criticism;

6200.  If you embrace the possibility of failure, you open yourself up to enormous success you’ve never seen before;