What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0238

11851.  Maybe wealth isn’t solely about more money, but more joy, more value, more fulfilment, more collaboration, more meaningful moments, more celebration of your life and those that support you.  The “mores” that matter;

11852.  Become more valuable.  Learn to delegate.  Hire those that truly enhance our lives.  We trade our money (energy) to access others energy (expertise) in order to free us up . . . so we can create the most value;

11853.  Not living your best life, not sharing how to do it with others, not being inspired and inspiring in the name of “playing it small and safe” is greedy.  The world loses your gifts;

11854.  Spending more than we make is a terrible choice leading to bankruptcy.  Yet by thinking life is something to reduce and money is something to “save” rather than earn and grow, we limit our potential and our production;

11855.  The hustle and grind would say save money by doing it yourself.  “If you want something done right, do it yourself” . . . and burn out.  And limit your best abilities.  And have less wealth;

11856.  Less wealth by doing what you hate.  Less wealth by limiting the depth of your relationships.  Less wealthy by draining energy by doing so much to save by having it be less convenient and losing time;

11857.  Those who buy into the budgeting mindset are willing to sacrifice life for growing a bank account;

11858.  By cutting back to build wealth, you can become the miserable millionaire.  Rich in your account, broke in life;

11859.  Wealth is how you live and enjoy your life.  And if money is the primary reason or excuse you do or don’t do something, you aren’t wealthy;

11860.  If your time isn’t your own, if you are doing things that you loathe, if you are obsessed with saving fiat money (that inflation decimates), if you wish the past were different or only focused on getting to a future date where your life will be better, you aren’t wealthy;

11861.  Money matters, but so do so many other things as well.  No money can lead to massive stress, debt, self-judgment, guilt, shame, embarrassment.  But no matter how much money you have, if you don’t have time to connect with people, cultivate relationships, be creative, have hobbies, have time for your health, fulfillment will be elusive;

11862.  What does wealth look like for you?  What matters most in your life?  What would you do if money were no longer a concern or worry, if you had an unlimited checking account?  What would you start doing?  How would your thinking change?  What would it take to create your richest life?  What can you do that matters most to you?  How could you experience a life that you love?  The key to wealth is within your answers to these questions.  Invest the time.  Only you get to decide.  If someone else chooses for you, you lose.  If you are unclear, you may be manipulated or have energy leaks.  This is the hard work worth doing.  The hard work that matters.  Not pushing through artificial deadlines or doing things you hate to make money.  But to know what you want, go for it and design a life you don’t want to retire from;

11863.  Pecans are harmful to dogs.  They contain a toxin called juglone, which can cause gastrointestinal upset, seizures and even death in dogs;

11864.  Sometimes when one door closes another one opens, but unfortunately many times we often focus on the door that has slammed in our face that we miss the window of opportunity just around the corner;

11865.  New beginnings often start with painful endings;

11866.  Be thankful for those closed doors and detours, they are guiding you to a better place;

11867.  I can say I was at Tom Wilson’s 800^th career game.  He’s the 9^th player in (Washington) Capitals history to play in 800 games;

11868.  Every experience, good or bad, carries a lesson.  What defines you isn’t what happens to you, but how you choose to grow from it;

11869.  The Power of Letting Go: The stories we tell ourselves about not being good enough are just that, stories.  Letting go isn’t about forgetting; it’s about freeing yourself from what holds you back;

11870.  Life has a funny way of forcing us to face the things we avoid.  Sometimes it feels unfair, overwhelming or even unbearable.  But when you pause, reflect and truly let go, you’ll see that every challenge carries a hidden gift, a chance to break free;

11871.  If they wanted to, they would, is a false statement.  We vastly overestimate people’s capacity for emotional regulation, conflict resolution and self-reflection.  Many want to they just don’t know how.  Stop taking other people’s limits personally;

11872.  According to Dr. Rhonda Patrick, one should take: 1.  Omega-3; 2.  Vitamin D; 3.  Sulforaphane; 4.  Magnesium; and 5.  A multivitamin;

11873.  According to Dr. Mark Hyman, a good level of vitamin D > 50 ng/ml;

11874.  If you don’t have enough vitamin D acutely, you get rickets and your bones bend;

11875.  You get vitamin D from the sun, wild fish and certain things like wild mushrooms.  You don’t need much (vitamin D) like 30 units;

11876.  If you don’t have optimal levels of vitamin D, say 50 ng/ml, you’re going to get osteoporosis, you’re going to be more prone to infections and you’re going to die from COVID-19;

11877.  To get 200 micrograms of selenium, you need to eat four Brazil nuts;

11878.  To get 30 milligrams of zinc, you need to eat 45 pumpkin seeds;

11879.  According to Dr. Mark Hyman, at minimum, one should take: 1.  A multivitamin; 2.  Vitamin D; 3.  Fish oil; 4.  (For most people,) magnesium; and 5.  (Probably) a probiotic;

11880.  In wanting to create something healthy, you have to make sure that you and whoever you’re going to build with want the same things.  That you’re willing to create your own definition of what love and marriage and partnership looks like.  And that, whatever that definition is, that you will commit to protecting your definition because it may not be the world’s definition.  It may not be your parents’ definition or the church’s definition or whatever, but you’ve got to be willing to protect your definition so that you can have a bond that lasts throughout time;

11881.  Three mandatory questions you should ask your partner before marriage to make sure that his/her answers are in alignment with yours.  And, if they’re not, then you should probably reconsider being in the relationship.  1.  Making sure that you have a shared expression of faith not even just a shared faith, but what does this expression look like for you?  How does it show up in your world?  Because everybody who believes in God isn’t trying to live a life of light, love, goodness, conviction and humility so making sure you have a shared expression.  It’s not just the same beliefs, it’s the same shared expression of the belief.  2.  What is the most traumatic experience you’ve had in your life and how does the residue of that experience show up in your presence?  3.  What brings you joy?  This world is tough.  And I want to know the secret to putting a smile on your face when the world’s trying to wipe it off;

11882.  Demerara sugar is a raw sugar extracted form sugarcane.  It is minimally processed so it has a golden-brown color and large grains that give a crunchy texture;

11883.  Demerara sugar originated from the British colony of Demerara now called Guyana;

11884.  Demerara sugar has flavors of molasses and toffee with hints of subtle caramel;

11885.  The term, “grog,” comes from the nickname, “Old Grog,” given to the 18^th-century English admiral Edward Vernon.  Vernon ordered that rum be diluted with water for the health of his sailors and the sailors nicknamed the mixture “grog.” . . . It’s also why you’re “groggy” when you’re hungover;

11886.  The British Navy’s “open vat” rum blending system involved pouring rum into large, interconnected vats allowing it to mature and blend for up to two years.  The vats were never completely emptied, but rather topped off with new rum, creating a solera-like system where decades-old rum was part of the blend.  This process continued for over 150 years until the rum ration was abolished in 1970;

11887.  Black Tot Rum (BlackTot.com) has the last of the British Navy’s blended rum in its spirits;

11888.  Apparently, without chill filtration, fatty acid esters will make liquor hazy if the alcohol content goes below 46.5 A(lcohol )B(y )V(olume). . . . You can get rid of the haze by (simply) shaking the bottle;

11889.  I can say I’ve drank British Navy rum;

11890.  The hamburgers at McDonald’s have gotten smaller;

11891.  (Italian) tomato pie is pizza without the cheese;

11892.  Red wine doesn’t go with (mini) cupcakes;

11893.  I can (now) say (that) someone has written me a poem;

11894.  “The Play That Goes Wrong” is pretty funny;

11895.  I can say I witnessed Alexander Ovechkin’s first hat trick (and the 32^nd of his career) against the (Edmonton) Oilers( live on Sunday, February 23, 2025);

11896.  Rachael Yamagata is from Arlington, Virginia;

11897.  Apparently, Rachael Yamagata is a tequila fan;

11898.  Taylor Swift might have stolen the (song) lyric, “And I forget about you long enough to forget why I needed to,” in (2012’s) “All Too Well” from Matt Nathanson.  He wrote, “And I’ll forget about you long enough to forget why I need to” (in 2003) for (his song) “I Saw;”

11899.  People will always: 1.  Misinterpret you; 2.  Project their fears onto you; and 3.  Form opinions based on incomplete information.  And that’s not your problem.  In the end?  It doesn’t matter: 1.  Someone idolizes you?  Cool.  Doesn’t change who you are; and 2.  Someone despises you?  Also cool.  Still doesn’t change who you are.  Because at the end of the day, you’re just you.  And that’s all you ever need to be;

11900.  I never thought I’d see (much less like) a musical/play about corn, but “Shucked” is pretty funny;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0237

11801.  According to Owen( Cook), he sees happiness in my eyes . . . and that I should take a dance or improv class;

11802.  I can say I’ve gamed/gone out with Owen( Cook);

11803.  You can love a person wholly without having to love all of him/her;

11804.  The notion of unconditional love is a myth.  Adult love lives in the realm of ambivalence, which means that relational ambivalence is part and parcel of all our relationships.  We have it with our parents, our siblings, our friends, which means that we continuously have to integrate contradictory feelings and thoughts between love and hate, between excitement and fear, between envy and contempt, between boredom and aliveness.  It’s, you continuously negotiating these contradictions, that ambivalence and living with that ambivalence is actually a sign of maturity rather than continuously evaluating;

11805.  The idea that you will be accepted unconditionally is a dream we have for our parents when we are babies.  It’s not part of adult love;

11806.  How do we set ourselves up for the best relationship(s) upfront?  There is no “one and only,” there is one person that you choose at a certain moment in time.  And with that person, you try to create the most beautiful relationship you can, but you could have done it with others.  Timing is involved.  Lots of things are involved.  But there is no “one and only;”

11807.  There is no soulmate.  Soulmate is God.  You can think that you have a soulmate connection with someone, that you have a deep, deep meeting of the minds, of the souls, of the heart, of the bodies.  But it’s a metaphor.  It’s not a person.  It’s the quality of an experience that feels like soulmates.  There is no unconditional love.  We live with ambivalence in our deepest love relationships.  There are things we like and things we don’t and things they like about us and things they don’t.  And moments they can’t be without us.  And moments where they wish, on occasion, they could be away from us.  That’s normal;

11808.  Distance is very important in a relationship.  Every relationship straddles freedom and commitment.  Togetherness and separateness.  Connection and independence.  In every relationship, there is often one person who is more inclined to the connection and one person who is more inclined for the separateness.  One person is more afraid of losing the other and one person is more afraid of losing him/herself.  One person is more in touch with the fear of abandonment and one person is more in touch with the fear of suffocation.  We all have both.  But we organize our relationship in which one of us will take on the role of this duality.  So we need connection and we need distance.  We need the things that are joint and together and we need the things that are separate.  The separateness doesn’t mean that there is deadness in the relationship.  So when you ask how long can we be apart, it depends on what you do with the space in between.  If you keep the space in between alive when you are away;

11809.  The University of Virginia sits on plantation land that belonged to James Monroe;

11810.  James Monroe was one of the founding board members of the University of Virginia;

11811.  When his presidency ended, James Monroe lived/resided at Monroe Hill now included in the grounds of the University of Virginia;

11812.  James Madison was the second rector of the University of Virginia.  He was appointed in 1826 after the death of Thomas Jefferson;

11813.  The thing about people who mean everything they say; they thing everyone else does too;

11814.  I can say I’ve been to a reception at a Smithsonian museum(, specifically “An Evening with President Jim Ryan” at the National Museum of American History);

11815.  If you take a sip of coffee and have to sneeze, the coffee’s going straight out of your nose;

11816.  Life hack: Salad (especially with a protein) makes a good filler for a burrito, sandwich or wrap;

11817.  If you have a craving for prime rib, on Tuesdays from 11:00 AM to 10:00 PM, the Light Horse Restaurant & Bar (TheLightHorseRestaurant.com) in (Old Town) Alexandria has a $20.00, (16 oz.) prime rib special;

11818.  “Kirk” is “church” in Scottish/northern English;

11819.  If a restaurant does not have good bread don’t bother with the cake;

11820.  You need to make your own tartar sauce to be considered a high-end seafood restaurant;

11821.  Dogs can eat acai in small quantities; however, acai contains theobromine, the same ingredient in dark chocolate that causes chocolate poisoning;

11822.  If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it;

11823.  If you don’t ask, the answer will always be no;

11824.  If you don’t step forward, you’ll stay in the same place;

11825.  Apparently, dogs should not eat pumpkin pie.  Pumpkin pie is high in sugar and fat, which can upset a dog’s stomach, especially for small dogs.  Pumpkin pie contains seasonings like nutmeg, which can be toxic to dogs.  Pumpkin pie filling also contains condensed milk, which can upset a dog’s stomach;

11826.  Turbinado (sugar) is a type of sugar that still contains some of its natural molasses, giving it its brown-blond color and light caramel flavor;

11827.  Rotary engines do not have (any) pistons;

11828.  Gillian Welch says her heart soars when someone cheers for the banjo;

11829.  David Rawlings believes no one would ever steal a banjo;

11830.  Meghan (Wallen) really likes icing.  She said she’ll eat the icing off doughnuts and cakes and leave the rest;

11831.  Relationships matter.  Some have a shelf life and others grow through your entire life;

11832.  What we hold in, holds us back;

11833.  What we are afraid to face minimizes our future;

11834.  It takes work, but it doesn’t have to be a grind.  Work ethic is part of the equation, but leads to burnout without clarity and collaboration;

11835.  Don’t let one thing define you: how you look, the size of your house, your car, your awards or accolades.  Those things don’t bring sustained happiness especially if you are trying to prove something to someone else.  Trying to prove something to someone else may be motivating initially, but it leads to bitterness and anger, fed by a feeling of lack, of scarcity;

11836.  Stay open.  Listen to your intuition.  Ask for support.  Ask better questions, more questions.  Not learned, but learning.  Not educated, but educating.  Not arrived, but present . . . in the moment;

11837.  I can say I’ve made out in the backseat of a car( specifically a Jaguar F-Pace);

11838.  The wrong philosophy combined with hard work limits impact.  It is a grind.  There is a reward, but it is limited;

11839.  If you want to play an exponential game, focus on value.  Add more value.  Grow your value;

11840.  Who helps you to see your potential?  What is holding you back from living your potential and turning it into profit?  Is it a bad partnership?  Procrastination?  Lack of mentors?  Lack of a community?  Scarcity?

11841.  Labor does not equal wealth.  You can work hard and not get ahead at the rate of inflation.  Or you can scrimp to save money only to have it lost to inflation as well.  Value equals wealth.  How you create it, how you store it, and how you understand it.  Value is the key;

11842.  Wealth is in the in between.  In between our ears certainly.  But also in between the events, the busyness that robs wealth.  Wealth happens in the moments and space of life.  In fun.  In fulfillment.  In freedom.  Freedom of choice.  Freedom of time.  Freedom to live where you want.  Freedom to work with who you want, when you want.  Freedom to provide, to create and to take a trip without feeling (or worrying about) the financial effects;

11843.  Some people step from moment to moment, event to event, with the inconvenience and effort draining life.  Doing too much on their own to save money at the expense of time and energy.  However, those with resources can focus on efficiency and become more effective.  The wealthiest people have more support.  This creates leverage of their greatest gifts and value.  The team matters.  Those who have a great team have earned ways to focus on the most productive things.  And for the truly wealthy, this means finding time to enjoy life along the way.  (Some just do more work even though they rarely, if ever, enjoy the fruits of their labor);

11844.  Some of the richest people rarely have a free moment or time for themselves because it is all about more.  They work to fill a void from earlier years with money, accolades and net worth.  Hoping to have respect or prove themselves or relieve their pain.  But this doesn’t mean they are fulfilled.  From the outside, it may seem this way.  But when it is only about more, more can destroy relationships, diminishes and discounts wins and drowns out the special things that money cannot buy;

11845.  As Coco Chanel famously said, “The best things in life are free, the second best are very, very expensive;”

11846.  You can earn money, but you can also earn happiness and the path may not always align;

11847.  When money becomes the reason or excuse for not having time, for not being present, for providing money over memories . . . when it becomes profits over people or a relentless pursuit at the expense of love, we lose.  The good news, it isn’t an either/or;

11848.  Money follows value.  It chases value.  Money doesn’t give a shit about effort.  Effort isn’t the key or determining factor;

11849.  Thinking is hard work.  Hiring people and developing skills can be difficult, but not as difficult as doing everything yourself.  The intelligent adage of smart work and hard work, but not hard and isolated work.  Collaboration is the key to value, to prosperity.  Scarcity and the consumer condition confuses people, causing them to think labor or time equal money;

11850.  The hustle culture spouts that we must sacrifice (family, memories, love) to have more money.  Again, there are those who earn it by giving up all other areas of life, but that isn’t required.  It will hold you back;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0236

11751.  Every new skill, every business breakthrough, every personal transformation, all reside in that gap between who you were and who you could become not in the space of exhaustion and overwhelm;

11752.  Reframe your relationship with discomfort as you progress through the year.  See it not as an obstacle, but as a signpost pointing toward your next level of growth.  Your future more resilient, more successful, more fulfilled, self is waiting on the other side of that discomfort;

11753.  Embrace the challenge.  Trust in your ability to grow.  And, remember, discomfort isn’t just part of the journey, it’s often the purest sign you’re on the right path;

11754.  The most successful people don’t just tolerate discomfort.  They actively seek it out.  They’ve learned to turn discomfort into their superpower;

11755.  3 strategies to transform discomfort into a continued springboard for success: 1.  Reframe Your Perspective: Instead of seeing discomfort as something to avoid, start viewing it as a signal that you’re on the right track.  When you feel that familiar twinge of unease or anxiety, smile.  It means you’re pushing your boundaries and growing; 2.  Practice Intentional Discomfort: Don’t wait for discomfort to find you.  Seek it out in small, manageable doses.  Take on a challenging project.  Have that difficult conversation.  Learn a new skill.  By regularly stepping out of your comfort zone, you’re building your resilience muscle; and 3.  Reflect and Celebrate: After each bout of discomfort, take a moment to reflect.  What did you learn?  How did you grow?  Celebrate these small victories.  They’re the building blocks of your future success;

11756.  Your adult self understands the value of this process.  But your child or teen might still resist.  That’s okay.  Acknowledge those parts of yourself then gently remind them of the growth that awaits on the other side of discomfort;

11757.  I can say I’ve seen Scott Bakula (i.e., Sam Beckett from “Quantum Leap”, Jonathan Archer from “Star Trek: Enterprise” and Dwayne Pride from “NCIS: New Orleans”) perform live( as Abraham Lincoln);

11758.  Abraham Lincoln served in the state militia during the Black Haw War, but saw no combat;

11759.  Abraham Lincoln served as the postmaster for New Salem;

11760.  Abraham Lincoln was not a member of any organized religion, but he did (read and) believe in the Bible;

11761.  I am very much a visual learner.  I need to see examples.  I don’t understand as well from hearing things and being lectured to;

11762.  Alexa Landestoy, Al Koken and Rachel Nichols look different in person than they do on television;

11763.  Nicklas Backstrom said, when he first came to the (Washington) Capitals, he, Mike Green, Alexander Ovechkin and Alexander Semin used to hang out a lot outside of the (ice hockey) rink;

11764.  Alexander Ovechkin says he doesn’t remember anything that happened when the (Washington) Capitals won the Stanley Cup;

11765.  Besides family events, Alexander Ovechkin said winning the Stanley Cup was the best feeling ever;

11766.  Apparently, Alexander Ovechkin isn’t superstitious about touching the Stanley Cup;

11767.  According to Stephan Jenkins(, the lead singer for “Third Eye Blind”), Alex LeCavalier (the bassist for “Third Eye Blind”) is a huge hockey fan;

11768.  According to Steve(n) Oleksy(, the former Washington Capitals forward), he’d rather play at Capital One Arena than Little Caesars Arena and he’s from Detroit(, Michigan);

11769.  I can say I’ve seen been at a bar (specifically District E) with Troy Brouwer, Eric Fehr, Rod Langway, Steve(n) Oleksy, Jeff Schultz, David Steckel and 20-some (Washington) Capitals alumni;

11770.  Chicken and waffles is messy arena food.  I’m talking about you, maple syrup;

11771.  It stands to reason, then, that to be witty, we need to be unconventional and unexpected in how we use language;

11772.  The comic triple surprises people because where they might expect a list to contain only 1 sentiment, the comic triple contains 2 and the 2 sentiments couldn’t be more different;

11773.  (Rebecca is right,) the smoked, creamy, chicken salad sandwich at Sweet Fire Donna’s in (Old Town) Alexandria is better with bacon;

11774.  Journaling provides the opportunity to learn new lessons from old experiences.  Reading your old journal entries is a bit like reading a great book for a second time.  You pick up on new sentences and see the past in a different way.  Only this time, you are re-reading the story of your life;

11775.  Journaling sharpens your memory.  Time will change your face without you noticing, but it will also change your thoughts without you realizing it.  Our beliefs shift slowly as we gain experience and journal entries have the ability to freeze your thoughts in time.  Seeing an old picture of yourself can be interesting because it reminds you of what you looked like, but reading an old journal entry can be even more surprising because it reminds you of how you thought;

11776.  Journaling motivates you to make the most of each day.  There is something about knowing that your day will be recorded that makes you want to make at least one good choice before the sun sets;

11777.  Journaling provides proof of your progress.  Writing down one sentence about what went well today gives you something powerful to look at when you’re feeling down.  When you have a bad day, it can be easy to forget how much progress you have made.  But with a journal, it’s easier to keep a sense of perspective.  One glance at your previous entries and you have proof of how much you have grown over the months and years;

11778.  Being authentic doesn’t always guarantee connection.  In fact, if you’re not careful, your authenticity might not resonate with others and, then you’re left feeling misunderstood;

11779.  It’s not just about being yourself; it’s about making sure that your authenticity is relatable.  That’s where the magic happens.  When you can express yourself in a way that’s true to who you are, but also resonates with the person/people you’re talking to, you create a powerful, genuine connection.  But there’s a balance to it.  You can’t compromise who you are to please others; that’s just people-pleasing.  At the same time, you can’t be completely oblivious to the vibe or context of the situation;

11780.  Not everyone will vibe with your energy and that’s okay!  It’s not a reflection of your worth, it just means that connection wasn’t meant to be.  The real win is staying true to yourself without bending over backwards to fit in;

11781.  Remember: Authenticity + Relatability = Connection;

11782.  If you learn to use adversity right, it will buy you a ticket to a place you couldn’t have gone any other way;

11783.  At least 15 people in this world love you in some way;

11784.  A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone even if they don’t like you;

11785.  Every night, someone thinks about you before they go to sleep;

11786.  You mean the world to someone;

11787.  If not for you, someone may not be living;

11788.  You are special and unique;

11789.  Have trust sooner or later you will get what you wish for or something better;

11790.  When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it;

11791.  When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a hard look; you most likely turned your back on the world and the people who love and care for you;

11792.  Someone that you don’t even know exists loves you;

11793.  Always remember the compliments you received.  Forget about the rude remarks;

11794.  Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know and you’ll both be happy;

11795.  If you have a great friend, take the time to let her/him know that s/he’s great;

11796.  Fear of abandonment disappears once you stop abandoning yourself;

11797.  Apparently, the players from the DC Power Football Club (of the USL Super League) go to Decades in D.C. for Halloween;

11798.  Apparently, a woman isn’t gay even though she started dating a woman a couple of months ago;

11799.  According to Adelaide Gay(, the goalkeeper for the DC Power Football Club), a lot of professional female soccer players date women;

11800.  I can say I’ve “hit on” the DC Power Football Club team;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0235

11701.  Any sticking point in your life right now, whether it’s in your career, relationships or personal development, can be traced back to where you stand on the “Scale of Transformation;”

11702.  The Scale of Transformation: 1.  Apathy: The lowest state, where you’ve given up and disconnected.  You might not even realize you’re in this state because it feels like nothing matters; 2.  Grief: This is where you feel like a victim.  It’s a step up from apathy because there’s at least some emotion, but it’s still a tough place to be; 3.  Fear: More energy here, but it’s you versus the world.  It’s the kind of state where you’re constantly worried and playing it safe; 4.  Anger: You’ve got fire and you’re ready to fight, but it’s still a competitive state.  You’re driven by the need to prove something; 5.  Courage: The first collaborative state.  Here, you’re not just reacting to life; you’re starting to create it; 6.  Desire: This can be a useful tool to keep you moving forward, but, be careful, your ego can hijack your authentic path if you’re not aware; 7.  Purpose: When you align with your true purpose, everything changes.  Life becomes less about proving and more about being; and 8.  Love: The ultimate state, where you’re fully connected to life and others in a deeply, meaningful way;

11703.  The challenge is identifying where you currently are in the “Scale of Transformation” and what advice you should be following based on that.  Too often, people try to jump too high, aiming for purpose when they’re stuck in grief and then they fail and give up.  Instead, focus on moving just one or two levels up at a time;

11704.  If you’re tired of surface-level changes that don’t stick, the “Scale of Transformation” offers a way to make deep, lasting transformation.  It’s about re-owning the parts of yourself that you’ve disowned and becoming whole again;

11705.  Reflect on where you are on the scale right now.  Identify the next level you need to aim for.  And start applying the right advice for your current state;

11706.  In today’s world, the key to connecting with others, whether it’s in a conversation or a presentation, boils down to one essential principle: You have to go first.  If you want others to feel passionate, you have to radiate passion yourself.  If you want them to be excited, you need to bring that energy first.  This is all about the “Law of State Transference:” What you feel, others will feel;

11707.  Too often, people get stuck in their heads, worried about how they’re coming across.  They hold back, try to play it safe and, in doing so, they miss the chance to truly connect.  When someone’s not fully present, when they’re unsure, it’s hard to engage with them;

11708.  Being charismatic and captivating requires vulnerability.  It’s not just about being authentic; it’s about letting go of your fears and truly expressing yourself.  Think of it like singing. It’s not just about hitting the right notes; it’s about feeling the music and letting it flow through you, regardless of judgment;

11709.  When was the first time you felt anxious?  Was it at birth or was it later?  Maybe it was when you were a child, learning about societal rules through punishment and reward.  Or when you were told to be quiet in a restaurant or felt embarrassed by a comment in school.  These early experiences shape how we react to situations today, triggering our old fears;

11710.  When we experience anxiety, it often stems from past experiences where we felt judged or rejected.  The key is to realize that these fears, while real, are disproportionate to the reality of the situation.  To truly break free, you need to confront these fears head-on.  Embrace them and don’t let them control you.  As Peter Levine describes in his book, “Waking the Tiger,” trauma can be released by allowing ourselves to “shake it off,” much like how animals in nature deal with stress.  By acknowledging and letting go of these old triggers, you get back to a more natural state of being.  It’s about being true to yourself, embracing your passions and letting go of the judgments you fear.  The day you stop being triggered is the day you truly find freedom;

11711.  Breakups are tough.  They can shake you to your core, leaving you feeling lost, hurt and, sometimes, even questioning your self-worth.  It’s completely normal to feel the way you do.  When a relationship ends, especially one that felt so intense, it can feel like your world is turned upside down.  You might be questioning everything; wondering if you’ll ever find someone like that again or if you’ll ever feel whole.  You’re not alone in this;

11712.  One of the most important steps after a breakup is to create some space between you and your ex.  This isn’t about avoiding them or pretending they don’t exist, but rather giving yourself the room to heal and rediscover who you are outside of the relationship.  It’s about learning to date yourself again so to speak.  If you can, limit contact for a while even if it’s hard.  Your well-being comes first.  Take this time to really explore who you are now.  You’ve changed because of this relationship and that’s okay.  Embrace those changes and figure out what they mean for you moving forward;

11713.  It’s also crucial to honor the grieving process.  Don’t stuff down those feelings or try to rush through them.  Feel them fully because that’s how you start to let go and move on;

11714.  Relationships, even short ones, can bring up a lot of old wounds and insecurities.  The relationship didn’t define you and the breakup doesn’t either.  Take some time to reflect on your patterns in relationships.  Do you shut down when things get tough?  Do you avoid conflict instead of facing it head-on?  These are important questions to ask yourself because understanding these patterns is the first step to changing them;

11715.  It’s also key to learn how to have healthy disagreements.  Conflict isn’t the enemy; avoiding it is.  Learn how to communicate your needs and frustrations in a way that’s constructive not destructive;

11716.  Remember, just because this relationship didn’t work out doesn’t mean you won’t find love again;

11717.  You have so much time to meet new people and have new experiences.  But before you rush into anything new, take the time to heal.  Take the time to work on your relationship with yourself.  That’s the most important relationship you’ll ever have;

11718.  Start talking to your younger self.  Find a picture of yourself as a kid and put it somewhere you’ll see it often.  Whenever you look at it, remind that little version of you that they are loved, that they are enough and that they’re going to be okay.  Reconnect with that part of yourself because that’s where your true healing will begin;

11719.  Your leftover rotisserie chicken will last (quite) awhile if you debone it and store the meat in your refrigerator;

11720.  Apparently, Quinton DuBose’s brother-in-law is (the comedian) Shuler King;

11721.  Caleb Followill (the lead singer for “Kings of Leon”) sounds like Chris Stapleton’s whiny, younger brother;

11722.  If you have a craving for schweinshaxe (i.e., German roasted pork knuckle or ham hock), Old House Cosmopolitan (OldHouseCosmopolitan.com) in (Old Town) Alexandria has an off-the-menu special Thursday through Sunday;

11723.  I can say I’ve been to a members only, private bar in (Old Town) Alexandria (specifically the Aerie for the Fraternal Order of Eagles);

11724.  Meghan (Wallen) says she’s only ticklish around the ribs;

11725.  I can say I’ve been to an HFStival;

11726.  Emerson Hart (the lead singer for “Tonic”) said the song, “If You Could Only See,” was a song he quickly wrote, when he was 21, after a conversation he had with his mom disapproving of a woman he was in love with and right before he signed a record deal for “Tonic.”  He said he ended up marrying and divorcing her. . . . Apparently, his mom was right;

11727.  “Violent Femmes” songs (just) sound immature.  They don’t hold up over time;

11728.  Apparently, after their set/performance at a music festival( specifically HFStival), the members of “Lit” like to hang out in the crowd and have some beers;

11729.  Wes Johnson (the public address announcer for the Washington Capitals) used to work morning radio at WHFS-FM;

11730.  Apparently, HFStival (1995) was one of Bush’s first shows;

11731.  Incubus’s bass player (i.e., Nicole Row) is rather attractive;

11732.  Ben Gibbard (the lead singer for “Death Cab for Cutie”) seems a little autistic in how he (rhythmically) swings his guitar back and forth;

11733.  Ben Gibbard (the lead singer for “Death Cab for Cutie”) lived in Herndon, Virginia.  He went to a year of middle school and a year at Herndon High School;

11734.  Apparently, HFStival (2024) (on September 21^st, 2024) is the last “The Postal Service” performance;

11735.  Ben Gibbard is the lead singer for “Death Cab for Cutie” and “The Postal Service;”

11736.  “The Postal Service” is pretty much “Death Cab for Cutie” plus Jimmy Tamborello and Jenny Lewis;

11737.  Ben Gibbard (the lead singer for “Death Cab for Cutie”) said he used to go to HFStival growing up;

11738.  According to Ryan Scott( from Top Chef season 4), you should have a cooking salt (i.e., Diamond Crystal kosher salt) and a finishing salt (i.e., Maldon sea salt flakes) . . . no iodized salt;

11739. According to Ryan Scott( from Top Chef season 4), the heat should be at 7 or 8 when grilling/searing;

11740.  According to Ryan Scott( from Top Chef season 4), you should have 2 oils for grilling . . . one for cooking and one for finishing. . . . Their smoke points should be between 350-400 degrees;

11741.  According to Ryan Scott( from Top Chef season 4), you should grill/sear your meat flat.  There should be no oil splattering.  You should smell the meat cooking and not burning.  And you should hear it cooking.  The meat should stay on 1 side for 70-80% of the time, flipped and the cooked to the desired temperature;

11742.  I can say that I’ve been lifted up by a Top Chef contestant (specifically Ryan Scott from season 4);

11743.  True transformation often manifests in the gap between our current self and our potential;

11744.  The moments of greatest discomfort often precede the most profound breakthroughs;

11745.  Our adult self understands that discomfort is part of growth.  But our child or teen?  They often interpret discomfort as a sign to retreat.  The key is learning to differentiate between harmful discomfort and growth-inducing discomfort;

11746.  Harmful discomfort feels like shame or fear.  It makes you want to hide.  Growth discomfort feels like a challenge.  It makes you want to push through even if it’s scary;

11747.  Deep down, when you feel that challenging discomfort, it’s a sign you’re pushing your boundaries.  You’re expanding your capabilities.  You’re growing.  It’s your adult recognizing an opportunity for evolution;

11748.  Where many people falter, they mistake growth discomfort for harmful discomfort and retreat to their comfort zone.  They let their child or teen take the wheel, interpreting the challenge as a threat rather than an opportunity;

11749.  It’s crucial to distinguish between growth discomfort and the harmful stress of overwork.  There’s a fine line between pushing for growth and pushing yourself to the breaking point.  Growth discomfort energizes you even as it challenges you.  It leaves you tired, but fulfilled.  Harmful overwork, on the other hand, leaves you drained, resentful and at risk of burnout.  If you find yourself constantly grinding, wearing “busy” as a badge of honor or neglecting your well-being in pursuit of success, that’s not growth that’s self-sabotage;

11750.  Every major achievement in your life so far has come from embracing healthy growth discomfort not from running yourself into the ground;