What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0156

7751.  More people are afraid of things like public speaking, heights, spiders and the dentist than they are of death;

7752.  Humans are only born with two natural fears.  The rest, we’re all taught by our parents, our society and our upbringing;

7753.  Humans are naturally afraid of sudden loud noises and falling from great heights.  They keep us safe from what could be a predator or danger that would cause harm;

7754.  Lessons from vulnerability (i.e., the willingness to be seen): 1.  Your story has the power to heal; 2.  Criticism is part of being seen and cannot be avoided; 3.  Portraying any image other than who you are causes self-inflicted stress; 4.  Community heals; 5.  If you show up, so will other people; 6.  If you don’t show up, don’t expect to receive; 7.  The narratives in our mind are not reality, they are our past; and 8.  People triggered by your vulnerability have their own healing to do;

7755.  Vulnerability simply means showing up, being seen and being heard.  For most of us, this is terrifying because as children we internalized the fear of showing up from adults around us.  We were judged or criticized (even in a light hearted way) and our nervous system felt the hit.  It recorded the memory in the subconscious, which is why our minds race as any type of exposure is felt.  They say, “Don’t do that again.  That isn’t safe;”

7756.  Work on becoming valuable to valuable people;

7757.  Every other fear, from that common fear of public speaking to social judgment to small spaces or spiders or dogs, is programmed into us throughout our lives;

7758.  Whatever your fear is, there was an event in your lifetime that created that fear in your mind.  All those paralyzing fears are completely learned;

7759.  10 things to say to your inner child: 1.  You are enough; 2.  I see you; 3.  You are worthy and can create your life experience; 4.  I understand; 5.  You live in a new reality now; 6.  It wasn’t your fault; 7.  I forgive you; 8.  You are a resilient warrior; 9.  I am here to guide you; and 10.  The present moment is safe;

7760.  5-step method for peak productivity: 1.  At the end of each work day, write down the six most important things you’d like to accomplish tomorrow.  No more than six; 2.  Prioritize these in order of true importance; 3.  When you arrive tomorrow, focus on the first task.  Work on it until complete.  Then move to the second task; 4.  At the end of each day, move unfinished items to a new list of six items for the following day; and 5.  Rinse and repeat;

7761.  If being heard is one of the things we crave/want most as being human then it explains why being thoughtful can have a powerful impact/meaning to us;

7762.  There are several different strategies to taking a nap during the day and optimal times to employ each of them.  The ideal scenario is timing your nap based on when you started your day;

7763.  The goal is going to sleep at a time when your slow-wave sleep (SWS) will perfectly intersect with rapid-eye movement (REM) (i.e., the time when you’ll get the deepest, most relaxing round of rest).  Just as an example, if you woke up at 7:00 AM, your ideal nap time would be 2:00 PM;

7764.  The “power” nap: If you just need a quick refresh, sleep for somewhere between 10 and 20 minutes.  You won’t enter really deep sleep so it’s easy to wake back up and return to whatever task is at hand;

7765.  The “coffee” nap: It’s the same as the power nap only you drink some coffee first.  Scientists say this actually works better for two reasons.  Caffeine is a stimulant so you’ll automatically feel more alert as it kicks in which happens to be right around the time you’re waking up.  The caffeine also competes with adenosine for the receptors in your brain.  Since adenosine is a chemical that promotes sleep and makes you feel more tired, it doesn’t really take hold as much as it would if you hadn’t consumed the caffeine before nodding off.  The end result is you may get a double benefit from pre-gaming with the coffee;

7766.  Research suggests 200 mg of caffeine is a good amount for a “coffee” nap although that’s a full two cups worth;

7767.  You should (probably) avoid taking a “coffee” nap too close to your regular bedtime.  You may run the risk of disturbing your regular sleep;

7768.  Most experts recommend stopping caffeine consumption a full six hours before bedtime;

7769.  The “almost there” nap: A one-hour nap is pretty good overall.  You’ll get the deepest type of sleep (slow-wave) but it might take you a little while to come around;

7770.  The “ideal full-sleep-cycle” nap: It takes about 90 minutes to run through all the different phases of sleep (light, dreaming, etc.) so sleep for an hour and a half is just about perfect.  You should wake up feeling really good and since you’ve completed the full cycle it should also be relatively easy to get up;

7771.  The “worst type” of nap: Sleep experts say a 30-minute nap will give you almost no benefit because you’ll wake up just as your deeper phases of sleep are getting underway;

7772.  Basically, consider a quick “power” nap with or without coffee or commit to a longer nap somewhere between 60 and 90 minutes;

7773.  There’s an interplanetary internet.  Currently, there’s a network between NASA and the International Space Station and, in the future, the moon and Mars;

7774.  I was supposed to be a father/dad on May 24^th, 2019;

7775.  Addiction is repeating a cycle of unprocessed emotions;

7776.  A lot of people believe that addiction is about the drug of choice.  It's not.  It's about escape and controlled suffering not just using it, but the entire process.  It includes the high of wanting the drug, the rush of going to find it, the hiding, the danger and the deep shame that comes afterwards.  They're addicted to the entire emotional process.  The process keeps them distracted from the present moment, but in a cycle of pain they don't know how to exist without.  The same pain that was familiar in childhood;

7777.  Addiction is a learned coping mechanism for self-hatred.  Self-hatred that has become identity;

7778.  How do we heal addiction?  1.  Heal the inner child; 2.  Process and release past trauma; 3.  Teach safety in the body; 4.  Allow emotional regulation; 5.  Rewire the pathways of the mind by using the present moment; 6.  Heal the gut; and 7.  Nurture the soul;

7779.  It is far better to buy a wonderful company at a fair price than a fair company at a wonderful price;

7780.  George Michaelis explains that there have been two basic themes in value investing: 1.  Buy assets; and 2.  Buy earnings power;

7781.  Buying assets focuses on buying a company well below its liquidating value;

7782.  As George Michaelis sees it, the problem with buying assets cheap is that the only way to increase the value is through some sort of event;

7783.  George Michaelis prefers the earnings power approach to value investing.  If a company earns very high returns year after year then, ultimately, those will be the shareholders' returns as well;

7784.  Three characteristics for "permanent" holdings: 1.  Good economic characteristics; 2.  Able and trustworthy management; and 3.  We like what the company does;

7785.  Warren Buffett has noted that many investors illogically become euphoric when stock prices rise and are downcast when they fall.  This makes no more sense than if you bought some hamburger one day, returned the next day to buy more, but at a higher price and then felt euphoric because you had bought some cheaper the day before.  If you are going to be a lifelong buyer of food, you welcome falling prices and deplore price increases.  So should it be with investments;

7786.  Warren Buffett believes financial disasters come about because stupid decisions in financial companies are not accompanied by immediate pain.  Instead, people give more money.  Seeing this, competitors indulge in mindless imitation.  Thus, when failure comes, it is huge;

7787.  The Chart House (Chart-House.com) has $.99 glasses of champagne or mimosas during Sunday brunch;

7788.  The artichoke (hearts) salad at the Chart House salad bar is (pretty) tasty . . . and so is the chicken salad. . . . I think there might be five spice (powder) in the chicken salad;

7789.  I am not judged by the number of times I fail, but by the number of times I succeed; and the number of times I succeed is in direct proportion to the number of times I can fail and keep on trying;

7790.  Most people think that because they have money problems that more money will solve their problems.  This is a myth.  The truth is that you solve your money problems by learning how to solve your money problems;

7791.  When people lie to us we personalize it.  We take the lying to mean something about how they feel about us.  We’ve been conditioned to believe this since childhood (i.e., behavior = how a person feels about us);

7792.  Behavior is how a person feels about himself/herself;

7793.  Lying is particularly painful because we feel violated.  We’re invested.  From our view, lying is a violation of trust.  We can’t see that lying comes from fear;

7794.  Children don’t come to lying naturally.  They learn it.  Children lie for one reason: to avoid perceived loss of love.  We carry this pattern to adulthood;

7795.  The statement, “You believe your own lies,” is accurate.  Our ego does this to protect us.  People who go through extreme measures to protect their lies have extreme levels of fear; fear of exposure;

7796.  How do you get past the fear of failure?  It’s simple, you embrace the suck.  You have to embrace being bad at something and get ready to learn.  When you can lean into that discomfort and allow yourself to start from scratch that’s when real growth occurs and real life begins;

7797.  What matters for your wellbeing is what you’re doing with the minutes and days of your life.  If you have a lot of money and a lot of nice stuff, but you’re spending your time doing things you dislike then your minute-to-minute happiness and overall happiness is likely to be pretty low;

7798.  People report feeling happier when they used their money for time-saving services than on material things;

7799.  Buying time is not only for rich people.  The average amount of money people spent on time-saving costs was between $80.00 to $100.00 a month and even the $40.00 created a notable difference in their happiness;

7800.  People actually get more happiness from buying experiences like trips and special meals than they do from buying material things like gadgets, clothes or shoes;