What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0222

11051.  (Try) say(ing) “How’s your day going?” v. “How’s it going?”
11052.  Loneliness is not the absence of people.  It’s the absence of connection;
11053.  I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone.  It’s not.  The worst thing in life is to end up around people who make you feel all alone;
11054.  Address the pain so you can return to work with full focus;
11055.  Communication is the exchanging of information.  It’s processed in the frontal lobe;
11056.  Connection is a feeling of understanding and ease of communication between people.  It’s processed in the insular cortex;
11057.  Technology enables communication not connection;
11058.  Communication is dealt.  Connection is felt;
11059.  Time-constraints severely limit our willingness to connect with others;
11060.  Happiness is only real when shared;
11061.  Knowledge: noun; acquaintance with facts, truths or principles, as from study or investigation;
11062.  Love: noun; a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person;
11063.  Wisdom: noun; knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgment as to action;
11064.  When you’re angry/infuriated at someone( in particularly your partner), ask, “What if I was curious instead of furious?  What if there’s a good reason?  What if it’s not what I think it is?  Can you tell me the reason you did that?”
11065.  Ways to apologize: 1.  I’m sorry I hurt your feelings; and 2.  I’m sorry I disrespected you;
11066.  Ask( your partner), “How do you ask for sex? . . . How do you signal you want sex? (i.e., If I say this . . .; If I mention such and such . . .);”
11067.  Ask( your partner), “What do you need me, to give me what I’m asking for?”
11068.  Ask( your partner), “What do I need, to give her/him what s/he’s asking for?”
11069.  Ask( your partner), “What are your pumpkin hours (i.e., not a good time to ask for sex)?”
11070.  The next woman I meet that I’m attracted to is, most likely/probably, not the “One.”  This is (both) liberating and disheartening/sad at the same time.  It takes the pressure off, but it’s sad too;
11071.  (A slice of) grilled pineapple on a (ham)burger is (really) tasty;
11072.  Apparently, Meghan (Wallen) likes to kiss/make out with other women;
11073.  Meghan (Wallen) has (small) pink nipples;
11074.  Apparently, Meghan (Wallen) likes to suck fingers;
11075.  The King Street Trolley in (Old Town) Alexandria doesn’t start operating/running until 11:00 AM. . . . It runs from 11:00 AM to 11:00 PM daily, year-round( including holidays);
11076.  The (Taco Bell) “Breakfast Crunchwrap” is tasty . . . and so is the (toasted) breakfast burrito;
11077.  Virginia Distillery Co.’s (VaDistillery.com) American whiskies are made of only spring water from the Blue Ridge Mountains, yeast and barley;
11078.  After the distillation process, whiskey, made with barley(, which contains gluten), is gluten free;
11079.  Rum can be made with a coloring agent that has gluten;
11080.  Whiskey pairs well with fatty meat, sushi and chocolate;
11081.  You should stay away from spicy food(s)/food(s) with a lot of capsaicin, when pairing whiskey( with food);
11082.  The fruitiness in whiskies is from the esters created by the fermentation process.  Fermentation is usually between 24-72 hours with the longer fermentation periods producing the fruit like flavors;
11083.  Apparently, Darius Rucker likes (covering) ’90 music/songs;
11084.  If you go to a Darius Rucker concert, you might hear a/some “Hootie & the Blowfish” song(s);
11085.  Brandi Carlile thinks Rufus Wainwright has a great voice;
11086.  Brandi Carlile’s favorite covers of “Hallelujah” are by Jeff Buckley, K.D. Lang and Rufus Wainwright;
11087.  Apparently, Brandi Carlile lives with her bandmates (i.e., Phil & Tim Hanseroth);
11088.  Visualization itself doesn’t cause reality to shift.  Visualization causes a shift in behavior . . . a shift in energy . . . a shift in identity . . . a shift in vibration . . .  a shift in action;
11089.  The “Air House,” the official residence of the chief of staff of the Air Force, is at Fort Myer in Arlington, Virginia, across the Potomac River from Washington, D.C.;
11090.  On January 21^st, 2009, the day after his inauguration, President Obama signed a United Nations protocol banning the use of incendiary weapons (e.g., napalm).  115 nations have signed the disarmament treaty, first introduced in 1981;
11091.  I didn’t think I’d like a heated toilet seat. . . . It reminds me of a heated car seat. . . . It’s rather nice when the air is chilly/cold;
11092.  I can say I’ve stayed/vacationed in a cabin with a(n) (senior) associate director of athletics (for academics and student-athlete support services) (specifically Justine Miller from Mount St. Mary’s University);
11093.  “Spicy Sweet Chili” Doritos are (pretty) tasty.  Apparently, they’re the only vegan Doritos (besides the “Toasted Corn”);
11094.  Apparently, a “glizzy” is a hot dog . . . or a pistol magazine;
11095.  Apparently, “trappin’ out the bando” means selling drugs at an abandoned house;
11096.  I can say that I’ve smoked in the vegetable garden terrace at Monticello;
11097.  Tomato preserves taste like grape jelly with a slight tomato aftertaste;
11098.  A good conversationalist’s talent is making sure the other person is comfortable;
11099.  With comfort comes openness, then comes rapport, then comes an environment ripe for witty banter.  We can do this by remembering to ask broader questions that aren’t looking for a right or wrong answer; 
11100.  The Peruvian rotisserie chicken at “Chicken + Whiskey” (ChickenAndWhiskey.com) is a little salty;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0221

11001.  Champagne bottle sizes: 1.  Quarter/Split – ¼ bottle, 187 ml; 2.  Half/Demi – ½ bottle, 375 ml; 3.  Bottle – 1 bottle, 750 ml; 4.  Magnum – 2 bottles, 1.5 L; 5.  Jeroboam – 4 bottles, 3 L; 6.  Rehoboam – 6 bottles, 4.5 L; 7.  Methuselah – 8 bottles, 6 L; 8.  Salmanazar – 12 bottles, 9 L; 9.  Balthazar – 16 bottles, 12 L; 10.  Nebuchadanezzar – 20 bottles, 15 L; 11.  Melchior – 24 bottles, 18 L; 12.  Solomon – 26.6 bottles, 20 L; 13.  Sovereign – 33.3 bottles, 25 L; 14.  Primat – 36 bottles, 27 L; and 15.  Melchizidek – 40 bottles, 30 L;
11002.  Crème brûlée and crème caramel are two different types of custard desserts.  Crème brûlée is made with a rich custard base that is topped with a layer of hard caramel.  Crème caramel is made with a caramelized sugar syrup that is poured over a layer of custard;
11003.  Pots de crème is typically richer and denser than chocolate mousse which tends to be lighter and airier.  Mousse generally contains both whipped cream and whipped egg whites to give it a lighter texture.  Alternatively, pots de crème are more commonly heated for a thicker and denser consistency;
11004.  You can refrigerate/freeze doughnuts.  To thaw( them), microwave them in 10 second increments;
11005.  (Choceur) dark chocolate covered coconut almonds taste like an “Almond Joy” candy bar;
11006.  Drumshanbo Gunpowder Irish Gin (really) does have a(n herbal) tea flavor( to it);
11007.  Gryffin (the deejay) looks like a surfer or a grunge band guitarist;
11008.  Reese’s Sticks are just Little Debbie nutty bars;
11009.  Timmy Trumpet (the deejay) reminds me of Robert Duvall’s character from “Apocalypse Now;”
11010.  Kygo is actually pretty good;
11011.  (Red) grapes seem to last a long time when they’re stored in an airtight container in the refrigerator;
11012.  “Cirque de la Symphonie” (CirqueDeLaSymphonie.com) is a cross between “Cirque du Soleil” and the symphony;
11013.  Luisa wears (athletic) thong underwear;
11014.  Luisa likes her feet massaged/rubbed;
11015.  I can say (that) I’ve been to a NCAA men’s volleyball championship game;
11016.  (UCLA’s) Andrew Rowan is a talented (volleyball) setter;
11017.  UCLA has won 20 NCAA men’s volleyball championships;
11018.  When talent is the most important thing, it teaches you one of the most dangerous lessons of all.  If you’re not good at it right away, give up.  If you have to practice then you’re not good enough. . . . Most dangerous of all, it binds your identity and self-worth to winning/succeeding;
11019.  We don’t get what we deserve in life.  We get what we believe we deserve;
11020.  The pork pipian (i.e., slow roasted pork shoulder served over cilantro rice and black beans, topped with a green mole sauce & crunchy pepita seeds) at Tequila & Taco (AlexandriaTaco.com) in (Old Town) Alexandria reminds of the pork morsels (i.e., marinated pork bites served with house-made cilantro sauce) at Havana ’59 (Havana59.com) in Richmond(, Virginia);
11021.  A scarab is a dung beetle;
11022.  Studies show that men with deeper voices tend to have higher testosterone levels (i.e., an indicator of dominance) and a more athletic body type;
11023.  Luisa sometimes goes commando when she’s working at home in sweats;
11024.  Luisa has nice feet;
11025.  Meghan (Wallen) said I have a nice voice;
11026.  According to Sam, if a woman invites you over to her home/place to hang out, she’s willing to sleep with you;
11027.  Apparently, the peanut oil used at Chick-fil-A is refined, bleached and deodorized, which means the proteins in the oil are stripped out so the oil is not considered a major food allergen;
11028.  The chicken at Wooboi Chicken (WooboiChicken.com) is tasty. . . . Level 3 is pretty hot/spicy. . . . The “Junior” (i.e., chicken tender, ciderslaw, butter pickles & Comeback sauce on a bun) is enough food for most people;
11029.  Apparently, there’s no “advantage” at deuce in college tennis;
11030.  Play the games you want to play.  Live the life you want to live.  Chase your dreams, not someone else’s;
11031.  Steve Aoki’s father, Hiroaki “Rocky” Aoki, founded Benihana(: Sushi & Japanese Steakhouse) and “Genesis” magazine;
11032.  According to Dimitrios( Lazaridis), the keys to a good pasta sauce are tomatoes you’d want to eat by themselves and olive oil you’d want to use by itself;
11033.  Apparently, that (decorative) plate at your seat at a (wedding) reception is called a charger;
11034.  Who makes the cake and desserts for their own wedding?  The answer is: Amira does;
11035.  Justin Trudeau does look like a young Fidel Castro;
11036.  Jasper (Ribbers) said I have a good soul;
11037.  Apparently, Ian (Bednowitz) is a (closet) rapper;
11038.  Having dueling pianos at your wedding reception is a (pretty) fun idea;
11039.  Apparently, you can use black bean to make a sugar free fudge-like dessert. . . . Just ask Amira;
11040.  The Mexican free-tailed bat is the fastest animal going horizontally. . . . It can reach speeds of 100 miles per hour;
11041.  The peregrine falcon is the fastest animal. . . . It can reach speeds of 242 miles per hour when diving;
11042.  The United States (Army Air Force) (in World War II) created bombs that housed (Mexican free-tailed) bats with timed incendiary devices on them (in order) to start fires on the largely wooden buildings in Japan;
11043.  Apparently, I can say I had my kayak pulled out of the Colorado River (in Austin, Texas,) by the lead singer of (the reggae band,) “Lion Heights;”
11044.  Apparently, you shouldn’t swim in the Colorado River in Austin(, Texas).  There’s a lot of runoff and industrial waste in the water;
11045.  The Texas State Capitol (building) was paid for by giving 3,000,000 acres (in the Texas Panhandle) to the builders;
11046.  All 3 of Terry Black’s Barbeque (TerryBlacksBBQ.com) sauces (i.e., “Central Texas Original,” “Sweet & Tangy” and “Spicy”) are tasty;
11047.  Life hack: When at Terry Black’s Barbeque, sit at the table with a person by himself/herself, who has a beef rib and is on his/her way to the airport.  You may get part of said/that beef rib;
11048.  Apparently, Elizabeth is a kleptomaniac . . . at least for barbeque t-shirts;
11049.  Subaru (Corporation) was the Nakajima Aircraft Company during World War II and was responsible for a large share of all Japanese combat-aircraft engines;
11050.  Napalm was created at Harvard( University).  It was tested in the middle of Harvard’s soccer field/pitch;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0220

10951.  It’s possible to experience stress without getting stressed out;
10952.  Stress is manageable if you put boundaries on your stressors;
10953.  Most high-achievers think being stressed out is inevitable because they’ve only learned to work hard not smart;
10954.  If you can learn to set healthy boundaries on your stressors, you’ll be amazed at how much high-quality work you can do with far less stress than you imagined;
10955.  There’s a big difference between being disciplined and being hard on yourself.  Unfortunately, most people grow up believing these two things are the same – that discipline is being hard on yourself.  And because they manage to do well in school, work, etc., it reinforces the belief that they succeeded because they were hard on themselves;
10956.  In reality, most successful people succeed despite their self-criticism not because of it;
10957.  Your discipline and work ethic will indeed help you succeed.  But your habit of beating yourself up with self-criticism and self-judgment is just making everything unnecessarily hard;
10958.  Self-criticism is not a sustainable strategy for staying motivated, but it will make you miserable;
10959.  If you can learn to let go of the habit of beating yourself up all of the time and instead practice some self-compassion, you’ll find that you can be at least as motivated as you’ve always been and far, far happier too;
10960.  Just because other people don’t appear to struggle with their emotions, doesn’t mean that’s actually the case.  Many people, especially people who are historically very high-achieving, are just really good at hiding their emotional struggles and coming across as cool and collected;
10961.  Trying to control difficult emotions always backfires in the end.  You don’t have direct control over your emotions.  You can’t just turn down the anxiety dial or raise the happiness lever!  And when you try to control them, you often end up feeling bad about feeling bad, which of course only makes things worse;
10962.  You don’t need to avoid or control your emotions to stay productive; you need a different relationship with them;
10963.  If you spend all of your time trying to avoid or control difficult feelings, you’ll be so exhausted that you have no energy left to actually get anything done;
10964.  There is no failure only feedback.  You win or you learn.  Both are equally good.  All negative feedback just provides the contrast to make the eventual win more appreciative;
10965.  Rejection does have to be personalized, it could be a wrong approach;
10966.  The world is your experiment lab to try new things and play;
10967.  You’re a unique person who has value (in the eyes of God) and the ability to learn specific skills and to provide value to others;
10968.  People enjoy you for your unique perspective energy presence and life experiences.  You always have something to add in a social interaction with your energy and words;
10969.  Reputation is temporary; character is forever;
10970.  No one can push down your value because of your inherent worth;
10971.  You’re a spiritual being having a temporary physical experience;
10972.  People are generally good and friendly when you show a win-win to them and you set boundaries if they behave badly;
10973.  People are deserving of love even those who have done you wrong;
10974.  When limiting beliefs invade every waking thought, they become self-fulfilling.  Soon enough, you believe one bad moment, word or decision impacts every aspect of your life;
10975.  No problem is permanent.  Only your soul is permanent and every problem can be solved;
10976.  What’s wrong is always available and so is what’s right;
10977.  Abraham Alexander was born in Greece.  His parents moved him and his brothers to Texas when he was 11;
10978.  I can say I saw Abraham Alexander (in concert) the day before his debut album, SEA/SONS, was released;
10979.  Bear Rinehart (the lead singer of NEEDTOBREATHE) looks like he’s having a lot of fun singing/performing;
10980.  Bear Rinehart’s solo project, “Wilder Woods,” is named after his two oldest sons;
10981.  Bear Rinehart was the 2002 South Carolina Player-of-the-Year as a wide receiver for Furman University.  He caught a (then) record 70 passes for a (then) record 892 yards;
10982.  Donovan Woods wanted to name( the song), “Man Made Lake,” “Lake Dad;”
10983.  Donovan Woods’ (ex-)girlfriend from college/university married a woman;
10984.  Apparently, Henry Jamison’s lawyer (i.e., the singer) is now Jack Harlow’s lawyer (i.e., the rapper);
10985.  A lot of famous artists have played at “Jammin Java” (JamminJava.com) in Vienna, Virginia;
10986.  Abundance is non-linear;
10987.  A true belief in the inherent goodness of yourself, of your heart and your soul, from your head to your toes, and in every fiber of your being is, unfortunately, rare;
10988.  Sitting underneath the scarcity belief of “there is not enough” is usually another, deeper belief, which is the belief that “I am not enough;”
10989.  It’s vitally important that you truly choose yourself.  Until you make that choice, on a deep level, nothing else can happen.  No matter what it is that you need to work on inside of yourself, you must first choose to give yourself the gift of focus before the shift can happen.  Make the time, create the space and do the work you need to do to change your old patterns and behaviors to allow more abundance to flow in.  Making that commitment is a demonstration that you are willing to choose yourself, to make yourself and your unique journey a priority;
10990.  Recognize that like everything in life, it is a journey.  The richness is in the path itself and we can often miss that when we fixate too much on a destination.  The truth is, there is no destination just a constant evolution of the ways in which we express ourselves in our lives.  A deepening of the fullness of that expression.  A deepening of abundance.  There is no “good” or “bad” on this journey (though there may be highs and lows).  Everything is an opportunity for learning and further evolution.  So, stop beating yourself up;
10991.  Whatever it is that you want to enjoy in your life of abundance, give yourself permission to have that.  Really want it for yourself, for no other reason than because you love yourself;
10992.  The pursuit of gratitude and compassion will make you happier than the pursuit of happiness;
10993.  Dr. Amit Sood’s insight shows that the quickest way to greater happiness is not by chasing happiness itself.  He says it is instead by cultivating and actively practicing gratitude and compassion in our lives;
10994.  It’s not in chasing the things you think you want that leads you to a lasting feeling of abundance or happiness especially if you want those things in order to heal some sense of “not enough-ness” in yourself;
10995.  You need to put in effort, especially by working on your internal state, if you want more abundance and not just sit around waiting for things to magically fall out of the sky;
10996.  It matters what kind of energetic place you’re coming from when you do things;
10997.  The practice of gratitude for what you already have is what makes your life feel full more than anything else and that, in turn, attracts more abundance to you.  In other words, abundance is not something you chase down like a predator.  Abundance is something that you put yourself into the right state to receive as you walk towards it in faith;
10998.  Seeking love and acceptance from others is not what makes you feel valued( and validated).  Practicing empathy and compassion for others is what leads you to feeling truly connected to love and to life;
10999.  The barbecue sauce at Sweet Fire Donna’s in (Old Town) Alexandria is Sweet Baby Ray’s( barbecue sauce);
11000.  The escargot sauce of diced tomatoes, garlic, parsley and butter at Le Refuge Restaurant (LeRefugeAlexandria.com) in (Old Town) Alexandria is (really) tasty;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0219

10901.  Relatively, we are living.  Life is our résumé.  It is our story to tell and the choices we make write the chapters.  Can we live in a way where we look forward to looking back?
10902.  Inevitably, we are going to die.  Our eulogy, our story, will be told by others and forever introduce us when we are gone;
10903.  The soul objective: Begin with the end in mind;
10904.  Matthew McConaughey’s 10 goals in life: 1.  Become a father; 2.  Find and keep the woman for me; 3.  Keep my relationship with God; 4.  Chase my best life; 5.  Be an egotistical utilitarian; 6.  Take more risks; 7.  Stay close to mom and family; 8.  Win an Oscar for best actor; 9.  Look back and enjoy the view; and 10.  Just keep livin(g);
10905.  Style is knowing who you are, what you want to say and not giving a damn;
10906.  You know who you are when you become independent enough to believe your own thoughts and become responsible for your actions and you not only “believe” what you want, but you live what you believe;
10907.  Live the questions first then what you believe . . . then you have your own personal style;
10908.  To appreciate a place, a character, a time, think of it as a place to live permanently; find the likeness, the goodness;
10909.  It is a necessity of man to leave what he knows so he can see what he knows.  Man must exit the comforts, the luxuries, the friendships, the advisors, the advice, the ears that listen, the pillows that he rests on and force himself into a corner, into a place where, when his mind has a thought and his mouth goes to speak it, there is no one there to listen, but himself and his god;
10910.  Technology is basically “good,” but we must respect it as a luxury because it is man-made not God-given;
10911.  One must leave home if s/he is to find home;
10912.  Create, appreciate, respect;
10913.  Beliefs are better than conclusions because you can drive them instead of just look at them.  Conclusions are the Model T on the showroom floor, there for all to ooh and ahh, while belief is the ‘81 Z28 (Camaro) on the highway;
10914.  Language rich in verbs is the most powerful.  Language built on nouns is weak.  If you rely on adjectives and adverbs you have lost your way;
10915.  The “country chicken dinner” at the Birchmere (Birchmere.com) in Alexandria tastes like Boston Market( rotisserie chicken) to me;
10916.  Stephen Kellogg (the singer-songwriter and former lead vocalist of “Stephen Kellogg and the Sixers”) loves the movie, “P.S. I Love You;”
10917.  Stephen Kellogg was once in a hot tub with Gerard Butler in Park City, Utah, during the Sundance Film Festival;
10918.  (Unsurprisingly,) freemasons are (a bunch of) old, white men. . . . During the 2023 George Washington Birthday Parade (in Alexandria, Virginia), I saw one nonwhite member and no one (I thought was) under forty;
10919.  The hamburgers at Burger King have gotten smaller;
10920.  Coca-Cola Move tastes like a (coconut) rum and Coke to me;
10921.  Almost everything everyone says is just a reflection of their own internal environment and it rarely has anything to do with you. . . . You just happen to be the victim of their rage or sadness in that moment;
10922.  Choosing to take the rage/sadness in and become a victim is up to you. . . . Getting offended is a choice. . . . Seeing yourself as a victim is a choice. . . . Living a life of freedom is a choice. . . . Choose the thing you want;
10923.  The work you do on yourself is for you, but the effects it has on the world around you is profound and rewarding.  So don’t avoid the dark/fucked up parts of yourself.  Use them as opportunities to light up the darkness within you;
10924.  If it’s in the way, it is the way;
10925.  Mike Krzyzewski (i.e., “Coach K”) was the head coach at the U.S. Military Academy Prep School at Fort Belvoir, Virginia, for 2 years before getting a graduate assistant coaching position at Indiana University;
10926.  A Papa John’s “papadia” is just a (round,) flatbread pizza folded in half;
10927.  You meet your destiny on the road you take to avoid it;
10928.  You might weigh more the day after eating (fried) pickles.  The salt (in the pickles) may make you retain water;
10929.  The Chinese were the first (culture) to distill alcohol;
10930.  (I can say) I witnessed Alexander Ovechkin’s 40^th goal of the ‘22-‘23 NHL season, making him the only player to score at least 40 goals in 13 (different) seasons( and passing Wayne Gretzky for the record);
10931.  Patrick Laine (the left winger for the Columbus Blue Jackets) is a massive man. . . . He looks slow and lackadaisical moving around the ice;
10932.  Alexander Ovechkin is tied with Mike Gartner for the most NHL seasons with at least 30 goals( at 17);
10933.  Crown Royal (Deluxe Canadian Whisky) is peaty;
10934.  Most people die a little every day while they’re alive.  “Living” while you’re alive is the goal;
10935.  Meghan( Wallen)’s favorite cake is chocolate cake with chocolate frosting/icing;
10936.  Meghan (Wallen) said she loves me( when she was drunk);
10937.  According to one of the owners, the food at the Royal Restaurant (RoyalRestaurantVa.com) in (Old Town) Alexandria is better before 11:00 AM and after 2:00 PM on weekends( when the brunch buffet isn’t being served);
10938.  The Royal Restaurant in (Old Town) Alexandria opened in 1904;
10939.  I can say I’ve been a part of a (street) magic show;
10940.  Eating lunch outside on a warm, sunny day seems like a wonderful idea.  In actuality, it’s less appealing when you have to guard against the wind blowing away your food, bugs landing in it, sticky hands/finger and spills on to your clothes/clothing;
10941.  In the absence of love and belonging, there’s always suffering;
10942.  True belonging is a spiritual practice.  It’s the ability to find sacredness in both being a part of something, but also the courage to stand alone;
10943.  Don’t walk through the world looking for evidence that you don’t belong because you will always find it;
10944.  Don’t walk through the world looking for evidence that you’re not enough because you will always find it;
10945.  Our worth and our belonging are not negotiated with other people.  We carry those inside of our hearts;
10946.  Braving is all about trust: 1.  B(oundaries): You set boundaries.  When you don’t know what they are, you ask.  You’re clear about what’s okay and not okay, which is (so) hard for people; 2.  R(eliability): You do what you say and you say what you do.  You’re not hustling for worthiness so you’re not completely over committing and not delivering; 3.  A(ccountability): You don’t back-channel and blame.  You hold people accountable in a straightforward way; 4.  V(ault): It is not only do you not talk out of school between us, don’t share things that are not yours to share; 5.  I(ntegrity): Choosing courage over comfort.  Practicing your values.  Choosing what’s right over what’s fun, fast and easy; 6.  N(onjudgment): You can ask for help without feeling judged and I can ask for help without judging myself; and 7.  G(enerosity): When something happens I assume positive intent;
10947.  There will be times when standing alone feels too hard, too scary and we’ll doubt our ability to make our way through the uncertainty.  Someone somewhere will say, “Don’t do it.  You don’t have what it takes to survive the wilderness.”  This is when you reach deep into your wild heart and remind yourself, “I am the wilderness;”
10948.  When you pay attention to what’s challenging, you become comfortable with the uncomfortable;
10949.  When you pay attention to what’s positive, you become more inclined towards it;
10950.  If you want to feel less stressed you need to stop managing your stress and start managing your stressors;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0218

10851.  Anguilla is a cash-heavy economy too;
10852.  You’ll need cash to rent a car (from one of the local rental companies) in Anguilla.  Credit cards aren’t accepted;
10853.  They drive on the left-side in Anguilla;
10854.  I was robbed in Anguilla. . . . I had my debit card stolen . . . by the (National Commercial Bank of Anguilla) ATM;
10855.  I can say I’ve been to Shoal Bay( in Anguilla). . . . There were only a few people on the beach;
10856.  I can say I’ve been to Bankie Banx’s Dune Preserve beach bar (BankieBanx.net/dunepreserve) in Rendezvous Bay, Anguilla;
10857.  Chicken pieces (specifically the breasts) are smaller in Anguilla;
10858.  There are wild goats on Anguilla;
10859.  There’s not a lot to see on Anguilla;
10860.  The menu at McDonald’s in Sint Maarten seems to be the same (menu) as in the U.S.;
10861.  I can say I’ve eaten at “Pollos Hermanos;”
10862.  If you’re a “Breaking Bad” and/or a “Better Call Saul” fan, there’s a “Pollos Hermanos” (PollosHermanosSXM.com) in Simpson Bay (and in Philipsburg) in Sint Maarten;
10863.  Buildings don’t have a lot of windows in Sint Maarten. . . . Most (of the) stores don’t have any windows;
10864.  I can say I’ve had Iberian/Iberico pluma (i.e., the end loin of the Iberian pig);
10865.  The food at “Le Pressoir” (LePressoirSXM.com) in Grand Case (in Sint Maarten) is excellent;
10866.  Grand Case on the French side of Sint Maarten seems to have all of the good restaurants( on the island);
10867.  “Juggie’s Place” (Facebook.com/JuggieSXM.sx), the self-professed, smallest bar in the world, in Philipsburg, Sint Maarten, has a special for 2 beers and a Cuban cigar for $2.99 USD;
10868.  “Krave SXM” (Facebook.com/KraveSxm) in Philipsburg might make the best burger on (all of) Sint Maarten;
10869.  Apparently, you need to wash your car at least once a week in Sint Maarten.  If not, your car will rust out in 3 years because of the salt in the sea spray;
10870.  Saturdays are the busiest days at Princess Juliana International Airport (SXM) in Sint Maarten;
10871.  Great leaders are not always in front.  They also know who to follow;
10872.  The arrow doesn’t seek the target, the target draws the arrow;
10873.  We must be aware of what we attract in life because it is no accident or coincidence.  The spider waits in his web for dinner to come;
10874.  We must chase what we want, seek it out, cast our lines in the water, but sometimes we don’t need to make things happen;
10875.  To see you, not make you, happy;
10876.  Some people will never be more attractive than in that first impression, from a distance, in that light, at that time, in that way we saw them, when our hopes became highest and our wish fulfillment was fully loaded.  They will never look better than in that initial, fuzzy-edged glimpse.  The impression.  The wide shot;
10877.  Some relationships are better in a wide shot.  More impressive in the impression.  Like that long-distance romance that fell apart when you moved in together.  Like that summer fling that only lasted through August.  That friend that became a lover that you now miss as a friend.  They’re better from a distance.  With less frequency.  With less intimacy.  Sometimes we need more space.  It’s romance, it’s imagination.  Distance is the flirt and the wink, it’s frivolous, it’s mysterious, a fantasy.  A constant honeymoon because we can’t quite see it, we aren’t quite sure about it, we don’t quite know it;
10878.  Some people get more attractive, have a greater impression on us the more we see them, the closer we look, in that light, at that time, in the way we see them, when our hopes are highest and our wish fulfillment is fully leaded.  They will always look better the more clearly we see them.  The close-up;
10879.  Closeness is the quiet moments together, the pain shared, the beauty seen, the honesty.  It’s authentic.  It’s reality.  A constant relationship because we can see it, we’re sure about it, we know it.  It’s making love.  It’s attachment.  It’s togetherness.  It’s private.  It costs us.  It hurts.  We own it.  And we like it that way;
10880.  The great man is not all to each, he is each to all;
10881.  The genius can do anything, but does one thing at a time;
10882.  Life, like architecture, is a verb.  If designed well, it works.  It’s beautiful.  And it needs no directions.  It needs maintenance;
10883.  It’s not a risk unless you can lose the fight;
10884.  First recognize the problem, then stabilize the situation, organize the response, then respond;
10885.  Time and truth.  Two constants you can rely on.  One shows up for the first time every time while the other never leaves;
10886.  You just live together, you live for the present.  You marry, you live for the future;
10887.  The paradox of tolerance: If a society is tolerant without limit, its ability to be tolerant is eventually seized or destroyed by the intolerant;
10888.  Philosopher Karl Popper said that to maintain a tolerant society, the society must retain the right to be intolerant of intolerance;
10889.  Planes like to land and take off into the wind.  It minimizes the distances needed to stop and take off;
10890.  Alexander Barabanov (the left winger for the San Jose Sharks) is quick and drives to the (front of the) net hard;
10891.  Timo Meier (the right winger for the San Jose Sharks) has a (really) quick release( to his shot);
10892.  Nicklas Backstrom’s son, Vince, plays (ice) hockey( for The St. James Hockey Academy). . . . He likes scoring goals;
10893.  Vince( Backstrom)’s favorite player is his dad;
10894.  The Dutch side of the island is “Sint Maarten;” the French side is “Saint Martin;”
10895.  The best road for ourselves and society lives on the path that leads to having more values and competence;
10896.  Values are not only guiding principles we can all agree on, they are the fundamental ethics that bring people together.  When we are competent at our values and place more value on competence, we create a more valuable society and that means more return on our investment, us;
10897.  When you can design your own weather, blow in the breeze;
10898.  When you’re stuck in the storm, pray for luck and make the best of it;
10899.  We all have scars, we’ll get more;
10900.  Rather than struggle against time and waste it, let’s dance with time and redeem it because we don’t live longer when we try not to die, we live longer when we’re too busying living;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0217

10801.  Some of the deepest peace we can experience is living in integrity.  You can lie to other people about who you are, but you can’t lie to your heart;
10802.  Be careful not to let the noise of your mind overpower the whispers of your heart;
10803.  Life is always happening in just one moment.  That’s all you’re responsible for;
10804.  You can’t lifehack wisdom.  Do the work;
10805.  My parents (especially my dad) are not good at communicating (simple) things (such as we’re going out to dinner or I have an appointment on Friday). . . . It’s probably where I get that from;
10806.  (I’ve noticed that) I tend to tune out my parents especially if it’s a thank you or a compliment;
10807.  Segregation was legal.  Slavery was legal.  Don’t use legality as a guide to morality;
10808.  Cynar is made from artichokes.  It tastes like bitters/Campari;
10809.  The squid (in the fried calamari) at Galae Thai (GalaeThai.com) in Alexandria is so tender and not chewy at all. . . . And so is the duck (in the gang ped yang);
10810.  Brad Meltzer isn’t as tall as I thought he was;
10811.  Apparently, coconut water is (supposed to be) good for a cough;
10812.  Feelings aren’t facts;
10813.  Our feelings shift constantly throughout the day.  Sometimes minute by minute.  You’ll notice you feel so strongly about something and then an hour later you feel completely differently;
10814.  You can have many feelings (usually conflicting) at once;
10815.  Feelings come from deeper emotions( typically unconscious); they’re our interpretation of emotions.  That interpretation is based on our past experiences then reinforced by thought patterns that create more emotional responses;
10816.  Many of us struggle with emotional regulation.  When we haven’t learned to regulate, feelings become overwhelming.  We want to avoid, self-medicate or cope in ways that allow us to escape the sensations and the thoughts that come with intense feelings;
10817.  Feelings are simply experiences of the mind and body.  They come, shift and change.  They’re temporary.  When we become conscious, we can witness the feeling(s) while understanding we are not the feeling.  The feeling is not a concrete fact.  It’s a message;
10818.  We can choose how we respond to that message rather than letting that message drive our choices and behaviors;
10819.  Some people will judge you for changing.  Others will celebrate you for growing;
10820.  Henry Ford, founder of the Ford Motor Company and one of the best-known Americans of his day, held overtly anti-Semitic views and was not afraid to express them;
10821.  The famed American aviator, Charles Lindbergh, was a pro-German white supremacist, who embraced the Nazi’s anti-Semitism;
10822.  Plantation iced tea is (sweet, black) tea and pineapple juice;
10823.  Porn isn’t real sex.  The news isn’t real facts.  Red Bull isn’t real energy.  Alcohol isn’t real courage.  Video games aren’t real life.  Gambling isn’t real investing.  Caffeine isn’t real adrenaline.  Social media isn’t really social.  Degrees aren’t real knowledge;
10824.  Social media never shows the whole picture.  Perfection is an illusion;
10825.  On Tuesdays, Virginia’s Darling (MaesMarketAndCafe.com/virginiasdarling) in (Old Town) Alexandria serves double pours of already open (bottles of) wine until they’re finished/gone;
10826.  Sake (flavored) Kit Kats do (actually) taste like sake;
10827.  Ruthie’s All-Day (RuthiesAllDay.com) in Arlington has the biggest brunch (fried) chicken biscuit I’ve ever seen.  It’s big enough to feed 2 people;
10828.  The beef carpaccio at Mia’s Italian Kitchen (MiasItalian.com) in (Old Town) Alexandria is tasty;
10829.  I can say that I’ve had wild boar. . . . It tastes like a cross between a pork chop and a (beef) steak;
10830.  The molten lava cake (with vanilla ice cream, hot fudge & French Chantilly cream) at Bistro Sancerre (BistroSancerre.com) in (Old Town) Alexandria is tasty.  It has good chocolate flavor and it’s not too sweet;
10831.  It’s spelled “Sint” Maarten (i.e., the country/island) not “Saint” Maarten;
10832.  When you don’t remember a person’s name: I remember meeting you, I’m X;
10833.  (Vanilla) ice cream (topped) with (a little) eggnog is tasty;
10834.  (All of the) restaurants/stores take USD in Sint Maarten;
10835.  Oxtail reminds me of short ribs;
10836.  It’s $2.00 USD to ride the bus in Sint Maarten.  They’re independent drivers/owners licensed/regulated by the government.  There isn’t a set schedule.  You can wait for them at a bus stop (i.e., “bushalte”) or hail them when they drive by.  They run until 8:00 PM or 9:00 PM depending on when they want to stop working;
10837.  What do license plates mean in Sint Maarten: 1.  B/BUS – bus; 2.  M/P – private/passenger; 3.  MF – motorcycle; 4.  R – rental car; 5.  T – tourist bus; 6.  TAXI – taxi; and 7.  V – truck;
10838.  Sint Maarten is a (very) cash-heavy economy. . . . So bring a lot of cash/money;
10839.  You can travel freely between the Dutch and French sides of Sint Maarten.  They don’t stop you at the border;
10840.  There are wild dogs in Sint Maarten;
10841.  There are wild roosters in the French Quarter( of Sint Maarten);
10842.  The French Quarter in Sint Maarten seems very poor;
10843.  I can say I’ve had goat( curry);
10844.  (Curried) goat reminds me of (beef) pot roast/brisket;
10845.  There are no traffic lights or stop signs in Sint Maarten just/only roundabouts;
10846.  There are very few speed limit signs in Sint Maarten;
10847.  Some taxi drivers in Sint Maarten (specifically Kevin) think I look like Elon Musk (around the eyes) and (that I) talk like him( too);
10848.  You can take a (20-minute) ferry from Sint Maarten to Anguilla;
10849.  There’s also a ferry to St. Barts;
10850.  Merchants take USD in Anguilla as well;

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0216

10751.  Misery lies between your expectations and reality.  Close the gap;
10752.  The universe is very giving.  Nobody has tried 100% and never got what they wanted;
10753.  Jealousy can either be demotivating or used to beat them;
10754.  Motivation is not a real thing; discipline is;
10755.  The result of everything that happens to you either good or bad is completely and utterly your fault;
10756.  If you allow life to happen to you and you’re not going to happen life, you’re at the mercy of the wind;
10757.  Don’t make excuses.  Don’t play the victim  .You’ll end up stagnating and going around in circles;
10758.  People complain for sympathy and dopamine;
10759.  Nothing happens by accident.  Calculate, plan and reflect;
10760.  It’s very easy to become a professional at big things when you’ve mastered being a professional at small things (e.g., never be late, wake up on time, replay to calls/e-mails punctually, etc.);
10761.  Women, who mean the most truly protect my spirit, love, care and use intuition to truly want the best for me;
10762.  Respect your elders.  Confront adversity with respect.  Phrase questions or challenge ideas in a thoughtful and respectful way;
10763.  The way you perceive stress or any stimulus will affect the outcome.  Negativity breeds negativity; positivity breeds positivity.  Outlook is key;
10764.  Get off the internet, interact and put yourself in difficult scenarios;
10765.  To the older population, we are the weirdos; understand the variety of different upbringings in different eras.  Don’t be so narrowminded and arrogant;
10766.  Status signaling has been around from the dawn of time; peacocks have feathers for a reason;
10767.  Money, status and power are driven by the innate ability to (want to) find the best partner;
10768.  Men also want the respect from/of other men;
10769.  Discomfort and trauma, channeled in the right way, can birth amazing things;
10770.  The most monumental things achieved in life have been on the backs of being pissed off or sad;
10771.  For average guys, social media can be a very negative experience.  Do you use that negative experience as motivation or sulk and victim blame?
10772.  Wherever you’re at in your life, how can you add to your quality of life by subtraction?
10773.  Anger is just an emotion that covers up hurt.  Hurt is just an emotion that covers up fear.  Fear is just an emotion that covers up insecurities;
10774.  When you are angry, don’t feed into it.  Stop, pause and ask yourself what is hurting me?
10775.  Nolan Ryan never won a Cy Young( Award for best pitcher in Major League Baseball);
10776.  Gordie Howe only had 2 Gordie Howe hat tricks (i.e., a goal, an assist and a fight) in his (very long) career;
10777.  Freedom of expression does not equal the absence of consequence;
10778.  Skrewball whiskey does tastes like a peanut butter cup;
10779.  According to a real estate agent friend( of mine), a little known rule about multiunit housing with a FHA loan is that the units you aren’t living in need to cash flow the entire property;
10780.  Laura Benanti’s mom(, Linda,) is a vocal coach. . . . She lives in McLean(, Virginia);
10781.  The motions of a symphony are called “movements” because the music should “move” you;
10782.  Liz Phair had an affair (with her manager) towards the end of her marriage;
10783.  Charlie (Dog) likes pumpkin;
10784.  The bottom 80% of men are fighting over the bottom 22% of women and the top 78% of women are fighting over the top 20% of men on Tinder/dating app(lication)s;
10785.  The male is likely to “like” the female 6.2 times more often than the female “likes” the male on Tinder/dating app(lication)s;
10786.  The United States currently has one of the higher Gini coefficients (i.e., most income inequality) of all of the world’s biggest economies at a value of 0.41.  The Tinder Gini coefficient is even higher at 0.58.  This may not seem like a big difference, but it is actually huge.  The United States Gini coefficient is higher than 62% of the world’s countries.  The Tinder economy has a higher Gini coefficient than 95.1% of the countries in the world.  The only countries that have a higher Gini coefficient than Tinder are Angola, Haiti, Botswana, Namibia, Comoros, South Africa, Equatorial Guinea and Seychelles;
10787.  A man of average attractiveness can only expect to be “liked” on Tinder/dating app(lication)s by slightly less than 1% of females (i.e., 0.87%).  This equates to 1 “like” for every 115 females;
10788.  You can be above average attractiveness and still only get liked by a few percent of women on Tinder/dating app(lication)s;
10789.  If you aren’t in the very upper echelons of Tinder wealth (i.e., attractiveness), you aren’t likely to have much success using Tinder/dating app(lication)s;
10790.  At the root of emotional immaturity is the lack of ability to regulate our emotions or to sit in emotional discomfort;
10791.  We skip from big moment to big moment and that’s the story we tell ourselves about our lives, but most of what we do is small, private and individually witnessed and experienced;
10792.  We might deepen our healing if we stop chronically dissecting our partner’s avoidance, narcissism or emotional availability and begin asking ourselves why we pursue people who cannot care for us in the ways that we need;
10793.  No one is coming to save you;
10794.  Personal accountability is the path to freedom;
10795.  Creating a different life means creating new habits;
10796.  Not everyone will want the best for you and that’s okay;
10797.  Old Ebbitt Grill is (Washington) D.C.’s oldest (bar and) restaurant;
10798.  (Remember to )check when the quarter ends;
10799.  Being negative only makes the journey more difficult. . . . You may be given a cactus, but you don’t have to sit on it;

10800.  My dad is a hypochondriac;