Monday, April 10, 2017

What I've learned since moving to D.C. (some of which should be obvious): 0106

5251.  It is not time that kills delight, but familiarity, neutralization and lack of purpose.  Another man might find your woman to be quite a turn on even though she seems old-shoe to you.  It may not be your woman who has worn out, but your capacity for desire.  You may feel like having as little to do with her as possible.  But your lack of desire is only that: a lack of desire.  You have spent so much time with your woman that you have “rubbed off” on each other, like two magnets that have demagnetized each other.  Familiarity breeds depolarization and depolarization breeds contempt among lovers;
5252.  Every moment you treat your woman as simply a childcare helper or a buddy, you are neutralizing the same sexual differences that would secretly attract you to your female babysitter or business acquaintance.  Over time, you actually begin to behave more sexually neutral with your woman than you do with other women you meet throughout the day;
5253.  When your woman is looking withdrawn, dark or downright ugly, assume she is a goddess and needs your divine invasion of her heart and body.  Notice your incipient feeling of disgust for her dark mood and take utter responsibility for her transformation.  You know how fully committed you could be to, say, finishing a project at work.  Treat her mood with the some ferocity of intent.  Her mood is your challenge;
5254.  A superior man knows that when things get dreary, it is his own doing.  He knows that he is only truly happy when giving his gift, fully and to the last drop.  He knows that depolarization is a sign that he has ceased giving fully of himself and so the world and his woman have ceased responding in fullness;
5255.  A sunchoke is like a potato, but sweeter;
5256.  Sometimes you must move on, to another job or another woman.  That’s fine, if it is a true movement of growth: clear, empowering and an aspect of the ongoing giving of your gift.  But, more often than not, your first impulse to move on comes when you have ceased invading the moment with your fullest capacity to give and instead are droning along, coping rather than creating;
5257.  It only takes a moment of meeting a real challenge to bring a man back to full purpose, an emergency or a threat that demands his best.  And it only takes a moment of praise and deep appreciation to re-evoke a woman’s radiance.  It can happen to your woman at the grocery store or at the spa, when a man signals his appreciation, or it can happen at the kitchen table with you;
5258.  A good woman is a source of inspiration and attraction into the world for a man.  He must never forget, however, that neither the world nor his woman is the purpose of his existence;
5259.  In your worship of women, never forget that they die.  In your enjoyment of pleasure and delight, never forget that your sensations and feelings are fleeting and never absolutely enough.  Women can attract you, heal you and inspire your gifts, but they will never satisfy you absolutely.  Never;
5260.  The play of your body wanting her body is the most obvious hoax of fulfillment.  If you have ever gotten the woman you’ve wanted, you know that it’s never as good as you hoped for, at least not for very long.  And yet you continue to be attracted, over and over and over, to the same woman or to different women.  You are deceived by the mirage of your own desire.  You are deluded by your own excitement.  Women are not to blame.  They are to be cherished;
5261.  Women are the epitome of appearance, all appearance, everything around you, potential and actual.  And like women, all appearance seems to promise you something you want.  You want success from your job.  You want love from your woman.  You want pleasure from your body.  You want obedience from your dog.  When you don’t get what you want – when you lose money, your woman hates you, your body is in pain and your dog bites you – you are unhappy.  When you do get what you want, you are less unhappy;
5262.  Your ultimate desire is for the union of consciousness with its own luminosity, wherein all appearance is recognized as your deep, blissful nature and there is only one.  Your desire for union with a woman is a stepped-down version of this ultimate spiritual need;
5263.  You can use your desire as a doorway to spiritual oneness.  Magnify your desiring to the brink of madness.  Sustain it with full breath, relaxed body and open heart.  Embrace your woman, if you have one, and give her what you want from her.  Give it all to her.  Give it away to her.  Give her so much of what you want from her that you can’t tell who is who, the chaser has become the tail and all motion stops in the intensity of self-release.  There is only one;
5264.  In a moment of attraction, let your desire feel to her, but don’t stop there.  Feel through her.  Do this constantly.  Feel through her body when you are having sex with her.  Feel through her anger when she is raging at you.  Feel through her darkness when she seems ugly.  Feel through her beauty when she most attracts you.  By feeling through all of her forms, the superior man is not distracted or obsessed.  Rather, his attention feels through the mirage of other and he is released of need in the revelation of oneness;
5265.  Ejaculation, for the most part, actually depletes and weakens you.  It feels great for a few moments, but the price you pay for the genital sneeze of ejaculation is a much higher level of mediocrity in your daily life.  You will find that you just don’t have the extra gusto necessary to live your life with utter impeccability.  Excess ejaculations pave the road to living a good life, but not a great life;
5266.  Most women can experience many orgasms and deeper and deeper orgasms.  And more importantly, most women have a natural connection between their genitals and their heart.  When you ejaculate and lose your erection, you are probably depriving your woman of her fullest capacity of heart reception and expression, which is evoked by relaxed, loving, watery hours of your fearless and unstressful genital penetration.  It is not simply your genital penetration that touches her deeply, though.  The main penetration she feels is your yielding into her, through her, in love.  It is the fullness of your presence, the actual invasion of her body by your consciousness that most ravishes her;
5267.  Just as your woman tests you emotionally, so she will test you sexually.  Even when you are trying not to ejaculate, she may energetically begin to “pull” the ejaculation from you.  As always, her deepest pleasure is in feeling your fullness, your strength and your love, even while she is testing you.  When you don’t ejaculate, but demonstrate that the fullness of loving is more important to you than the quick thrill of genital release then she can truly trust you.  But she will continue to test your capacity for loving even once you’ve demonstrated your capacity to bypass ejaculation for the sake of a much more profound bliss;
5268.  The bottom line is this: If ejaculation is not completely a matter of conscious choice for you, your woman knows she controls you sexually.  And as long as she knows she’s in charge, she won’t trust you enough to relax fully in the force of your loving.  She will always keep her heart somewhat protected.  Rather than surrender so deeply in your embrace that she is splayed into divine brightness, she will go for whatever moist pleasures she can get before you lose interest;
5269.  The front of your body, especially your belly, is the place where your energy meets the energy of the world.  When the front of your body is open and relaxed, your power flows freely and your presence fills the room.  You’ve probably been with people who seem to occupy more space in the room than most people.  They seem to command attention even though they are not doing anything obvious to attract it.  The front of their body is so open that their energy flows freely through the room, magnifying their presence;
5270.  If the front of your body has accumulated tension, throughout the day and throughout the years, you will hardly be able to sit up straight.  Your belly and chest will be tight.  Your thoughts will center on yourself.  Your energy will remain constricted in your head and your awareness limited to self-concern.  Your powerful presence won’t fill the room at all.  You might not even be noticed;
5271.  Right now, notice your breath.  Are you inhaling so deeply you feel your genitals bulging slightly?  Is your belly rising and falling with your inhale and exhale like a mighty bellows?  Your belly and lower abdomen are special places of power.  If your breath does not reach these areas, you can’t recharge your batteries.  You will feel weak and unsure of yourself.  Your effect in the world will be minimal, less than your full potential;
5272.  The kinds of saturated fats circulating in the blood that are associated with heart disease are even-chain palmitic and stearic acid.  Most palmitic and stearic acids in the body are produced in your liver when you eat carbohydrates.  They don’t come from eating fat;
5273.  Carbs and alcohol (a form of sugar), not saturated fat, trigger high blood levels of stearic and palmitic acid;
5274.  Alcohol doesn’t trigger much insulin secretion and small amounts may be protective against heart disease;
5275.  Saturated fats (palmitic acid and stearic acid) in your blood that cause heart attacks come from eating sugar and carbs, not fat;
5276.  Saturated fats (margaric acid) that come from dairy and butter show a reduced risk of heart disease;
5277.  Omega-6 fats from vegetable oils show no benefit and may increase risk of heart attacks;
5278.  Omega-6 fats from poultry, eggs and beef (arachidonic acid) seem to be protective against heart disease;
5279.  Omega-3 fats from fish are the most protective against heart disease;
5280.  A study published in Lipids in 2010 compared the effects of a very low-carb, high-fat diet with either high amounts of omega-6 or high amounts of saturated fats.  The researchers examined blood levels of fats, cholesterol and inflammation before and after different dietary changes.  They controlled diets by providing all of the food.  When they then measured blood levels of important markers of cardiovascular health (including blood levels of saturated fat, cholesterol and inflammation markers), they found that more than doubling the dietary intake of saturated fat had no impact.  The group that ate more dietary saturated fat in the absence of sugar or refined carbs had lower levels of inflammation across the board;
5281.  Saturated fats cause inflammation only in the context of two things: low levels of omega-3 fats and high levels of carbohydrates.  Take out the high-carb foods and add omega-3 rich foods or supplements and saturated fat is not a problem;
5282.  Many studies confirm that blood levels of saturated fat (palmitic, stearic and palmitoleic acid) are significantly correlated with the development of type 2 diabetes and heart disease.  But these fats in the blood are not coming from the fat you eat.  They are produced by the liver in response to the carbs in your diet;
5283.  Your total cholesterol should be under 200 mg/dl;
5284.  Your triglycerides should be under 100;
5285.  Your HDL should be over 60 mg/dl;
5286.  Your LDL should ideally be under 80 mg/dl (although this matters less than the LDL particle number and size);
5287.  Your ratio of total cholesterol to HDL should be less than 3:1;
5288.  Your ratio of triglycerides to HDL should be no greater than 1:1 or 2:1.  If elevated, this ratio can indicate insulin resistance;
5289.  The (rosemary,) French fries at The Liberty Tavern (TheLibertyTavern.com) in Clarendon are tasty;
5290.  Saturated fat actually improves your overall cholesterol profile in the face of a low-carb diet by lowering triglycerides, raising HDL and decreasing the small, dangerous LDL particles;
5291.  Cholesterol is a fatty substance produced by the liver that is necessary for thousands of bodily functions.  The body uses it to help build your cell membranes and to cover your nerve sheathes as well as much of your brain.  It’s a key building block for hormone production; without it you would not be able to maintain adequate levels of testosterone, estrogen, progesterone and cortisol.  Even more important, without it, you would die;
5292.  People with the lowest cholesterol as they age are at the highest risk of death;
5293.  Under certain circumstances, higher cholesterol can actually help to increase life span;
5294.  Attraction in women is the feeling of being desired by a powerful man who she can trust.  Power can be expressed many ways.  It does not just mean money or status.  It can be intelligence, humor, confidence or just the ability to get things done.  Expressing a bit of power, whether it is in the way you dress, the way you carry yourself or the way you talk, is the first step to generating attraction;
5295.  One of the big things guys often do not understand is women do not really desire men.  Instead, women desire to be desired;
5296.  True confidence and self-esteem are about not judging yourself at all.  Confidence is a state of non-worry of being present and occupied with the world as it is and not as it ought to be or as we judge it to be.  True self-esteem is the state of accepting oneself for good and for bad;
5297.  Inhale deeply, through your nose, and breathe through whatever tensions you notice in your body.  Inhale deeply into your lower belly.  Then exhale.  On your next inhalation, breathe into your lower and upper belly.  Then exhale.  On your next inhalation, fill your entire belly then your solar plexus and lower chest.  Then exhale.  Then inhale and fill your belly, solar plexus and your entire chest in that order.  For several breaths, inhale fully in this way, filling your lower belly all the way down to your genitals then the rest of your belly, solar plexus and finally your chest.  Then exhale fully, slowly and smoothly.  Throughout the day, practice this kind of breathing in random moments.  Pay special attention to any part of your body that seems particularly tense or closed.  For instance, if the area around your navel seems tight, then inhale into that area.  Literally inhale right into that area and open it with the force of your inhaled breath.  Like filling a balloon, you can stretch open the entire front of your body with your inhale.  In this way, you counter the effects of accumulated fear and anxiety stored in your body, which diminish your presence and force in the world.  Throughout the day, as soon as you feel tension in the front of your body, inhale into that area and open it;
5298.  Consciously contract the muscles of the floor of your pelvis.  This area includes your genitals, anus and perineum, which is the space between your anus and genitals.  This exercise of contracting your pelvic floor feels a lot like you are trying to stop yourself from going to the bathroom.  In addition to contracting the floor of your pelvis, practice pulling it upward into your body and toward your spine.  This upward pull will actually lift your scrotum slightly up toward your body.  As a single movement, practice contracting and pulling upward the entire floor of your pelvis, including the anus, perineum and genitals.  You can practice this in sets of 15 or 20 contractions, holding them as long as you can.  Do several sets like this, three or four times a day;
5299.  While you are having sex, but before you are close to ejaculating, practice contracting your pelvic floor.  While you contract it and pull upward, breathe the energy up your spine.  You will have to experiment to determine whether to inhale or to exhale the energy up your spine, although most people find that exhaling up the spine works best.  If you combine the upward contraction of your pelvic floor with breathing up your spine, you should lose just a little bit of your erection as well as the need to ejaculate.  As you continue making love, repeat this exercise as often as you need to in order to maintain relaxation and openness;
5300.  While practicing this technique, you may notice that you occasionally come very close to having an orgasm.  At this point, stop moving, apply the upward contraction of your pelvic floor and breathe the orgasm energy up your spine.  In addition to the upward contraction of your pelvic floor while breathing up the spine, some men find it helpful to clench their fists and teeth while looking upward with their eyes, especially when the urge toward ejaculation is particularly strong.  With practice, all the muscular action becomes very subtle and gentle until the entire exercise is done primarily through your breath, feeling and intention;

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